*This is the opinion of this writer and not Her Campus or Her Campus KU as a whole.*
“As long as women are using class or race power to dominate other women, feminist sisterhood cannot be fully realized.” –Bell Hooks, “Feminism is for Everybody”, p16
I have always considered myself a feminist, although I never fully grasped what it meant to be a feminist. I have always believed in reproductive rights, equal pay for equal work, and women and men sharing chores and parenting. Wasn’t that enough?
It wasn’t until I really began delving into the issues our society faced that I realized that men aren’t the only group who support sexist thoughts and actions. Women too can be sexist. I am not talking about your grandmother who thinks that you shouldn’t go to college. I am talking about me, I am talking about television shows, and I am talking about the “mean girls.”
Feminist issues may be gaining support, but there is a real problem that most women do not discuss: girl-hate. We will never achieve anything so long as we are fighting against each other. I think many women have the misconception that they can’t gain success without trying to outshine each other. That simply isn’t true. It may seem real in the patriarchal society we live in, but women, all ages need to know that sisterhood is powerful.
Photo found at: me-americangirl.blogspot.com
Fighting girl hate isn’t easy, mostly because we start at a young age, thinking a certain way, fearing a certain girl. So how can we conquer girl-hate?
First, we need to realize that all women need to advocate for freedom of choice. Women can’t be in denial about women’s rights issues. A prime example is calling someone a murderer for getting an abortion. All women should be fighting for the intention of individualism for us all.
Second, we need to stop hating a girl because she has qualities that maybe we don’t. We are taught to be jealous of other girls. After all, girls are simply obstacles in our way to find a man, right? How ridiculous does that sound? This may sound absurd, but we all have done it. Before you go thinking how pathetic you are, it’s not your fault. We are raised in a culture where television shows portraying women competing for the same man is normal.
Sometimes someone who is too similar to ourselves may threaten us. We are misguided into thinking that there can only be one smart girl, only one funny girl or only one pretty girl. Remember that disliking someone else doesn’t make you a better you. Also, that girl that you dislike so much may be a really cool person, who would have thought?
Photo found at: www.huffingtonpost.com
Thirdly, we need to quit sl*t shaming. Maybe you heard that this girl had sex with a few different people or maybe she acted sl*tty at a party. Maybe what you heard was a rumor or maybe it was true. Who cares?!
We have all heard that a woman who acts bossy is labeled as being a b*tch. We need to stop this. Since when did having confidence and self-esteem become an atrocity? We need to rethink our opinions on other females. Break the habit of listening to rumors, give up trying to find any small thing wrong with her and quit judging her photos on Facebook.
Remember we can’t change anything until we change ourselves; the foundation of feminism rests on us changing any internalized sexism that we may have. Lets make a vow to stop girl-hate.