Roommates can either be the be the best thing that’s ever happened to you, or the worst. Being forced to live with someone, especially if you were randomly assigned, will most likely not turn out as expected. I asked around URI to see what stories people revealed about the worst roommate they have had to live with and here’s a few of the horror stories that were shared.
Sophomore:
“My roommate smelled like mothballs and cigarrettes. She didn’t dry her laundry and would leave it to hang on the wooden furniture.”
Super Senior:
“My freshman year roommate’s bed was lofted across the room from my bed that was lower. Right before I was supposed about to fall asleep, she sat up in bed, turned toward me, and projectile-vomited from her bed onto mine where I was lying down. She then puked half into the trash can and half on our carpeted floor for the next two days and never cleaned it up. This was following months of foul smells drifting from her closet of dirty clothes that she never washed and sleeping on a sheet-less bed for most of the year.”
Senior:
“My roommate freshmen year seemed really down to earth, and then she went on to sexile me (keep me out of the room so she could engage in sexual activities) 95% of the first semester until I finally decided to move out. One Saturday night I was sleeping and woke up to briefly use the bathroom. I witnessed her giving a guy a BJ on the floor in the center of the room. He looked at me and asked me if I wanted to join…”
Grad Student:
“First day of school: it’s hot as balls and we were in a forced triple in Browning Hall. My roommates storms in the room wearing my brand new white tank top and smears her orange foundation all over it in an attempt to peel it off her sweaty self.
“First Halloween: steals my shoes, ruins them, puts them back in my closet, lies about it.”
“First Karma: I wake up to her ripping her bed apart early on a Saturday morning. Apparently the night before had been her first sorority social and she let one of her extremely intoxicated sisters sleep over in her bed. She woke up and her sister was gone so she took a shower and then got back in bed. But, her bed felt cold… Wet almost. Her sorority sister peed her pants in her sleep simultaneously peeing all over my roommate in the process and soiling her $200 sheets.”
Senior:
“Freshmen year I was placed with two suitemates who were super loud, obnoxious, and dirty. They would leave their clothes and sh*t everywhere in the bathroom (including their hair), never emptied the trash (literally was overflowing onto the floor), take showers for hours using up all hot water (leaving us with a nice balmy 52 degree shower), have photo shoots/parties in the shared bathroom, blast music till 4a.m. (my roommate and I once had to stage a screaming fight just so they would shut the f*ck up). Oh. And they had one of their boyfriends living in their room for a while, so I once walked in on him in the shower since he neglected to lock the door (and flush the toilet while we’re at it). Oh. And one would consistently sing songs over and over. I still cringe when I hear Fergie’s Big Girls Don’t Cry.
Super Senior:
“My freshman year roommate used to stay out all night and come back to the room when I was leaving for class and sleep all day. She also let her friend pour vodka in my fishbowl.”
Senior:
“I had six people living in one room during my freshman year. I lived in Barlow. It was me, my two roommates, their friend, his girlfriend, and her friend. They wouldnt sleep until 4a.m. every morning. I woke up to my roommate having sex in the morning almost every week. I hated it. I then moved out and got a single. Holla. But seriously though, six people in one room is crazy. I had to move out.”
Freshman:
“My roommate showered once a week, smelled like coffee beans and vomit, and never brushed her teeth. She had no sense of hygiene or any idea that she was gross. She would pick her nose publicly, eat with her mouth open, and burp/fart loudly constantly. She flicked her orthodontic elastics everywhere but the trash can, and she would never sweep the floor. In addition to the cleanliness problem, she was careless with other people’s property. She broke my xbox360 twice, dropped my flat screen three times, and knocked over my computer. Not to mention she used all of those things without permission.”
Sophomore:
“My roommate would come in at 2:00 a.m. every night, turn on all the lights and make food. One time I was sleeping and had a test at 8a.m., he comes in wakes me up and goes ‘Yo I just broke some kids nose. He looked at me funny.’ “
Senior:
“My first roommate had a naked problem, she was always naked. She do laundry, her homework, make her bed completely 100% naked.”
Freshman:
“My roommate pooped in our trash can when she was drunk and forgot. The next day we couldn’t figure out why it smelt so bad. I started digging through the trash and what do I find……. POOP.”
Junior:
“My roommate’s boyfriend got into a fist fight with my girlfriend.”
Grad Student:
“My roommate was known to get stupid drunk all the time and had a nasty habit of breaking my things (RIP iHome, Brita pitcher, piggy bank, etc). She had an even worse habit of stripping down naked and running around our floor, yelling about how white people were causing all her problems. Last I heard of her she had a DUI and doesn’t go to URI anymore…”
Sophomore:
“My roommate told RAs where my alcohol stash was…”