Casually dating two guys or more is all fun and games, but every relationship comes to a point where it either gets more serious or the two parties go their separate ways. The problem is that whether your feel more strongly for one man over the other, or you could be more serious with both men: You still have to choose and say goodbye to someone you really like. Talk about real life Bachelorette. Be real with yourselves, ladies, because we’ve all been there. And if you haven’t, consider yourself lucky. In these situations, I always like to say there are four options.
1. For the Career Procrastinator: BOTH
As with just about anything from schoolwork to grocery shopping, you’re going to wait until things are in dire straights before making up your mind. You’re content with the same old same old, and changes aren’t really your forte. As tempting as it may be, this option will cause a lot of unnecessary stress in your life; therefore, avoid it like the plague.
2. The Classic Choice: He’s Just Your Type
This is the guy that is like all your past boyfriends and flings. Everyone comments what a great couple you make, and your girlfriends think he’s just perfect for you. What can you say? You have a type. Although he may be someone you’re comfortable with, which is so, so important in a relationship, your typical type may not push you to grow as an individual within the relationship or beyond. If you were unhappy in past relationships, you may find yourself drifting back to a place of discontent.
3. The Unconventional Choice: He’s Unexpected
This guy is totally different from anyone you’ve ever been with before. That’s why you like him so much. His new perspective is refreshing, and you don’t know what to expect, so you’re often intrigued. Whether he’s a bad boy or a little nerdy, your friends may voice some concern. It is up to you whether or not you want to listen to your friends. You value their opinion, their points are valid, and often, you’ve thought the same things regarding this guy. Sometimes, you just have to jump in without your floaties, and learn for yourself. If your friends are true, they’ll stand by your decision and support you no matter what. Plus, you don’t want to regret not knowing if you could have had an amazing connection with someone while learning more about yourself.
4. For the Risk-Takers: NEITHER
This is my personal favorite. There are plenty fish in the sea, and if you’re struggling so much to make a decision between the guys, then maybe neither are right for you. There is nothing wrong with being on your own for a little while. Think of it as an opportunity to reground yourself in who you are and a chance to focus on self-improvement.
Remember, as much as this decision is weighing heavily on your mind, the guys might be going through a similar thought process. Translation: As much as you want him, he has to choose you back. The right man will come along ladies. Don’t stress, and happy dating.