Generally speaking, most college kids hope for a relatable, understanding resident assistant. This is especially hoped for during freshmen year, the period during which most students make the rough transition from high school to college. Could such an RA really exist?
Meet Jessica Kincaid! As a resident assistant for Denton Hall, Jess was welcoming and eager to share her experiences. Below is a short interview I conducted with her about the life of an RA, including a nice **personal touch**!
Q: How long have you been an RA?
A: This is my fourth semester, so almost two full years.
Q: What made you decide that this is what you wanted to do for your senior year?
A: Well I didn’t have the best RA my freshmen year. Then, in sophomore year, I lived in Oakland and moved in with people who already had friends, so I didn’t really have a “social spot” on my own floor and I wanted that to be different. I thought being an RA would help… create that kind of community on my own floor. It was also a way for me to step out of my shell a little bit because naturally, I won’t go up to people and say, “hey, what’s up!?” But that’s kind of my job, so now I have to do that!
Overall, it’s more like I wanted to find a place on campus because I also knew I couldn’t live off-campus. I lived in the Denton Community my freshmen and sophomore years and I’m a music major, so my classes are nearby and I’ve seen the same place change so much staff-wise, which is kind of cool.
Q: What are the best and worst experiences you’ve had with this job?
A: The best ones… well the staff meetings are a lot of fun! They turn into hangouts and I love planning events, especially involving decorating and craft stuff. It’s so cool to see your floor and community come together and see people making friends. Whenever I saw any of you guys talking to each other, like during the first six weeks of fall when we had to promote you guys talking to each other, it was like I had nothing to do because you guys were already doing that. It was amazing! I thought, this is so awesome and my floor is the best! Seeing that makes me really proud. I love that.
The worst part is just, obviously, when you have to deal with situations that are really scary… I had to deal with an alcohol transport a few weeks ago… the fact that you guys know that someone is going to be there for you is great, but it’s so scary when you’re that person! But it only happened once and we’re moving past that, so that’s good.
Q: And going off of that, what do you normally do in high-stress situations?
A: I mean, the first thing that goes through your head is, “Okay, what’s the protocol?” Then, usually, if you need backup, there’s always someone up and we have such a good staff that everyone is always there for each other. That’s one of the great things about being an RA – your staff members work really well together, especially in Denton. Just to have that support and knowing that someone will be up with you at 3:30 in the morning if necessary is so awesome. That definitely helps bring the pressure down. Also, you always have to page someone if something serious happens and they’re always really calm and collected, like “Let’s just take this step by step, you can do it!” So there’s never a situation where I don’t know what to do.
Q: Finally, this is more of a personal question – the floor has been buzzing with the news of your engagement since you announced it back in August, so congratulations! Would you mind sharing the story?
A: That’s so funny, yeah! So we’d been dating for five years at that point and we’re actually going on six this March. It’s always been long-distance so whenever I’m home for break, we try and spend all of that time together. So we talked abou…this particular winter break and… going out on his truck for a snow drive! I had a whole playlist put together and we’d planned to listen to some country songs and drive around, and it would be my first time because I’ve never been able to drive in the snow.
So I figured this is what we were going to end up doing on this particular weekend. For both of us, winter is our favorite season because we love the mountains and snow. He decided he wanted to go to a local city because I live in Lynchburg, Virginia, which is between two bigger cities. We decided to head to Roanoke, which is about an hour away, and we’d originally planned to go to the planetarium there but it was closed because of all the snow. Then we just decided to walk around that planetarium’s museum and drive around more, which was so nice. I honestly had no idea anything was special about this day, because my dad literally let me go, half asleep and in a bathrobe, like “Have fun! I’m going back to sleep.” And he knew the entire time!
So we were just having such a wonderful day and the view just kept getting better as we got closer to the mountains. Then we couldn’t find a place for lunch because literally every place had closed from 2-5PM or something, for some reason. Our usual is Panera Bread, but we ended up finding MISSION BBQ, so we sat there, ate our food, and then he disappeared to the bathroom for like, such a long time. He’d been so quiet all day but I just figured it had to do with concentrating on the road, so I never thought much of it. When he finally came back, he wanted to get right back up and start driving. Even though I wanted to wait and talk for a bit, he sat down for a minute or two before going, “Okay ready to go, now?”
So at that point, I was just like “Okay, sure, let’s do it.” Apparently, he’d spent all that time in the bathroom checking to see if the Roanoke Star was still open, which is a huge lit-up star on top of one of the mountains. My granddaddy was actually one of the first ones to light it up because he was a boy scout. I didn’t even know we were going until he suggested it after we left. We ended up going up the mountain and he was super quiet the whole way up. The day was just getting better and better because the snow looked so nice, and I was telling him all day what a perfect day this was.
When we finally got up there, there was no one there and I told him, “You know, this day just could not get any better.” And I turn around and he’s in the snow, KNEELING! At first, I said “What are you doing?!” because I really thought he was pranking me like Jim from “The Office” pranked Pam! He still laughs about that. Then he told me I was the love of his life and that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me and I didn’t even let him finish before saying, “Yes, of course!”
At this time, I was trying to make sure I remembered every detail and process what was happening at the same time. Then we Facetimed our parents. My mom, who was traveling, was so mad that my dad didn’t tell her it was happening that day! For me, it was so unexpected but so great.
Q: That’s so amazing! Is there anything else you would like to add that I haven’t addressed?
A: I just want students to know that my job as an RA is not to be a nark. I’m really here so that you guys can talk to me as a friend. It’s just that our job is to make sure that you’re always safe, as a priority.