If you’re someone like me, you probably get tired of hearing the phrase “These are the best years of your life”, generally paired with something other people think you should be doing, even after you have explained why you do not want to do said thing, or are trying to express what is currently making life difficult. It’s amazing to me that I have now been hearing this same sentiment expressed in a multitude of ways since childhood.
In high school, when people would bring this up with increasing frequency as graduation loomed towards us, I would just stare at them. “You mean to say the next fifty years of my life are just going to be downhill from here? Picking up trash with the National Honors Society, taking AP tests, and sitting on world’s most uncomfortable bleachers is the best my life is going to get?”. It’s disturbing to me how many people seem to buy into this myth. Life doesn’t end after the prom. I was happy to escape this rather morbid line of thinking and enter the world of higher education. A world filled with aspirations for the future, and an optimism that life will continue to improve.
However, when I entered college, I was horrified to discover that the same motto was still being thrown around, but this time with increased weight. College is supposed to be the best time of your life. No questions or comments allowed. Now, whenever I went home, although I was still asked the same questions (“What are you up to?”, “What do you want to do with your life?”) there was now an expectation of exciting stories filled with adventure and spontaneous fun. As a rather introverted and busy person, I have always fallen short of the mark. My rather boring responses always invite concerned looks and the typical “But you’re happy, right?” or “You do get to have fun?”, and the most dreaded comments regarding the great experiences others have had at college.
Am I happy? I suppose so. I’m not singing and skipping through the forest, but I also don’t cry myself to sleep every night. The lack of Snow White levels of cheeriness used to bother me quite a bit. Was there something wrong with me? Why wasn’t I enjoying my college career the way I was supposed to? I thought, perhaps, I was missing something that came so easily to other people.
While the uncertainty still sometimes creeps up on me during stressful moments, I have also realized that it is okay to not always be having the time of your life during college. As with high school, there are moments that are wonderful, like having an impromptu dance/karaoke session with your roommates, throwing a Galentine’s Day Party, or laughing so hard at an inside joke during Cards Against Humanity that you cry. It’s moments like these where you can see why some people think of college as some of the best times of their lives. There are many exciting moments during this time in our lives. It may be the first time you are away from your family and you get the opportunity to see what you are capable of in a less constricting environment, than was available to you in high school. Despite these perks, college is far from easy. There are times when college seems like the absolute worst thing in the world, like when you spend 16 hours studying during a weekend in an attempt to be prepared for a midterm, or feel the stress of balancing everything beginning to pull you apart.
I’ve decided that there’s nothing wrong with not finding college to be the best experience in the entire world. Life, as one of my ballet teachers once said, follows a bio-rhythm that we cannot control. Like the waves of the ocean, there will be times when you feel tremendously happy, and other times when things seem dark. Don’t limit life by proclaiming one section to be the happiest before experiencing everything that’s waiting for you; often times the “best years of your life” are going to be scattered amongst the worst and the most routine, hiding in the places you least expect and making life sweeter during the most chaotic of times. Never fear, most of your best years still lay ahead of you!