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Please Enjoy These 12 Stock Images I Love But Can Never Use

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Carthage chapter.

One of the most entertaining things about my position at Her Campus Carthage is the fact that I get to publish articles every week. HCC writes on a range of subject matter spanning from body image issues to hidden hilarity in English literature to literally anything Emily Parker writes (always a pleasure, Em!). And that’s just this semester. However, something about publishing articles that many people tend not to think about is the fact that we have to insert images to break up the text. You don’t want to just read a giant block of text, do you? Hence the photos.

Sometimes hunting for the perfect picture can be the most time-consuming part of my night, because I have to make sure it’s the right fit for the tone of the article. You can’t write an article about a serious issue then insert a GIF of Mr. Krabs playing a tiny violin or whatever this is supposed to be. On the other side of that, you should probably stick to lighthearted and carefree pictures when writing about travel and entertainment. Usually, the author of the article will compile a selection of their preferred images, but just like the article itself, those have to be proofed as well.

Over the years I’ve encountered my fair share of stock images and GIFs, some more pleasant than others, but some were just too interesting to forget. So, I started keeping a list of images that I’ve always wanted to use, but will never be able to fit into an article. Until now.

So grab a beverage, sit back, and enjoy these stock photos I’ve been collecting since October.

The Underwater Series

This is the first of many in a series I can only describe as an ANTM challenge gone wrong. It was actually the first stock photo I saw that encouraged me to start keeping a list.

The Ugly Duchess

“Alice did not much like keeping so close to her: first, because the Duchess was VERY ugly; and secondly, because she was exactly the right height to rest her chin upon Alice’s shoulder…”

It’s characters like these that I wish they made the protagonist in modern adaptations of famous novels. Just check out her Wikipedia page. You’ll love her.

Banana Gun

They always say that an apple a day keeps the doctor away but I wonder if an aggressively pointed banana has the same effect?

The Underwater Series (pt. 2)

This reminds me of morning swim practice in high school and not wanting to be late for the first class of the day.

Brown Monkey

Apparently this monkey suffers from the same eye condition as the bad guy from Mulan.

Young Pretty Blonde Making Weird Face

Apparently, she’s actually very photogenic, but she was just having a moment. It’s a mood, honestly.

Man Making Face With Brown Head Gear

This guy is my second favorite man making a face wearing brown head gear. Just behind Jack Met of AJR.

The Underwater Series (pt. 3)

Tyra would’ve ripped homegirl apart at the end of an ANTM episode. Notice the lack of pointed toes, the hunched back, the inability to find her light, and the pained facial expression. She would’ve been in the bottom two, for sure.

Brown and White Deer Near Grass

This is the same exact face I make when I catch somebody in a lie and I’m waiting to see how far they’re going to take it.

Three Men Playing Soccer

A modern renaissance painting.

Ravers

These guys definitely knew all of the lyrics to “It Wasn’t Me” and sang it passionately. One of them owned a Jeep.

Man in White Shirt

My favorite thing about this is that the image is technically named “Man in White Shirt” but the URL clearly says “Woman in White Shirt.” What’s the truth, pexels? What’s the truth?

And there you have it. Twelve stock photos I’ve had saved in my Google Drive that have haunted me daily. 

Jane Eckles

Carthage '19

Jane graduated from Carthage College in May 2019 with a degree in English and Secondary Education. She is from Merced, California, which is close enough to San Fransisco for her to confirm that the City by the Bay is her absolute favorite. When she's not teaching or writing articles, she can be found collecting any book she can get her hands on, watching Netflix, staring mindlessly into the void, or napping.