First off, I would like to clarify that you should also hit on girls and the cute non-binary kid. Really, just hit on any consenting creature that you find attractive. But, even though it’s 2020 and us ladies are #empowered, there’s still something daunting about the dynamic of a girl hitting on a guy.
I’ve recently come to the conclusion that I should be less of a coward and instead I should take matters into my own hands. Sometimes, I think we get so caught up in reacting to other people’s thoughts, needs, wants and desires that we forget how to act. I don’t want to be a person who is so busy reacting that I don’t make my moves against the universe to get the things that I want. Sometimes you need to be the actor and to let other people react to you.
The above paragraph is a far more concise manifestation of what my thought process was when I gave a guy my number with a poem about eye…snogging him. It was the age-old story: Hot guy shows up at the library (AKA prime hunting ground) and we keep making eyes at each other. At one point, I think he’s going to come over but then his all-female study group shows up.
I was getting rather peckish at this point, and didn’t particularly feel like waiting indefinitely for the possibility of this guy to finish his group project and then MAYBE say hello. So, that’s when I decided to take matters into my own hands. And because A) I am a writing dork, and B) somehow it seemed less scary if it rhymed, I wrote him a poem and left it on his table after I introduced myself.
Did I immediately flee? Absolutely. But even though my exit wasn’t graceful, I still had an ace in my deck. Because guys just don’t expect girls to hit on them, so if you do, then you immediately stand out. It says that you’re confident, and for once, they don’t need to muster up the courage to initiate something themselves. A girl hitting on a guy is a breath of fresh air for both parties. The girl feels like she’s taking charge of her own wants and the guy gets an ego-boost; it’s a win-win. Besides, the worst that can happen is that they don’t text you or that they don’t want to hang out. Which is exactly what would have happened if you never hit on them in the first place.
And maybe once you actually get to know them, you’re not going to vibe. That is the unfortunate reality of getting to know anyone, but the positive counter-part is that maybe you’ll really vibe. Sometimes it’s enough to see a beautiful stranger and to act in a way that leaves you open to finding out if they’re more than a superficially attractive husk of a person. And maybe, you’ll be like me and not only will they text you, but you’ll find out that the hot guy at the library also has a South African accent.