Moving back to school has presented a host of challenges and opportunities. To state the obvious, we are in the middle of a pandemic, the final months leading up to the 2020 presidential election, and the first few weeks of entirely online classes. My roommates and I have arranged to ‘split’ the wifi, so no one is kicked out of their 6:30 pm class. I’ve tried to safely spend time with friends, and through doing so, I have recognized the importance of being bold and saying yes.
Life is too short not to take every opportunity in front of us. In July, I accepted a part-time intern at a company I sincerely care for. Learning new technical skills in a remote environment and meeting coworkers via zoom posed some unique challenges. Still, more importantly, this experience offered a once in a lifetime opportunity to grow as a person and a learner. In the last couple of months, I have learned more about excel, accounting software programs, and professionalism than in my previous courses and internships. (Please keep in mind this is not a dis at LMU. At this point, I have not taken BCOR 2710, which teaches you how to use excel in great depths.) I accepted the challenge of getting hired during a global pandemic and accepted the challenge to prove myself to my employer in an entirely remote circumstance. It was not easy at all, but I created and took an opportunity to further develop my skills and knowledge.
As August rolled around, my roommates began moving back to our house, and we started getting in the swing of things. One week in, I made it my goal to say “yes” whenever someone asked me to do something. From the little things, like picking up my roommate from the airport and heading down to Playa for sunset, to the bigger things, like having tough conversations about the roller coaster of emotions in the last few months, saying yes gave me a chance to know myself and my friends more deeply. I was there for every inside joke, every Taylor Swift throwback on the drive to the beach, and every moment that made me feel more alive and present than the last. Inadvertently, I also became more productive with work and school because I wanted to make sure I left the time in my schedule to be with my friends stress-free.
On top of seizing as many professional and social opportunities, I have been pushing myself intellectually to learn more about things outside of school. I recently read The Defining Decade: Why your Twenties Matter and How to Make the Most of Them by Dr. Meg Jay. Dr. Jay is a psychologist who has spent her career working with all different types of people, from recent college graduates to young married couples to 40-year-old singles. In her book, she talks about how to make your twenties matter through your work life, love life, and mental and physical well-being. Her book made me dive into who I am, who I am becoming, and how I will get there. After reading the section on love, I decided to make some serious choices about my so-called “love life.” The most important takeaway I had was to only date people you could consider marrying. Dr. Jay’s main point was that although you know you will not match your current significant other, it is important to date the type of person you will marry. Many young men and women fall into dating down because it is easy. They are satisfied physically, and they think they have reached their dating peak. “The best time for [her] to start working on her marriage is before she is in one” (Jay). Instead of waiting for ‘the one’ to come, it is crucial to work toward being with the one now. Dr. Jay compares dating and a marriage to a dress rehearsal and a performance; why would you rehearse for the wrong play? Since reading this book, I have started to cut out past dates and friends who I cannot see in my life long-term. I took a bold move and told a boy I like him. If the feeling is not reciprocated, I would much rather move on now than wait for graduation when everyone seems to scramble for love. And if the feeling is returned, then there is no point in hiding it. I have always believed honesty is the best policy. Still, I am finally expanding that to say everything and not keep certain emotions hidden.
Being bold goes beyond seeking a new business opportunity, saying yes to a sunset date, and telling the boy you like him. It is learning how to accept your authentic self. It is sharing your love for bad music without shame, practicing the cartwheel you learned yesterday in your front yard on Loyola. Or learning to speak up when you are uncomfortable and issuing the appropriate F U when then situation presents itself. Once you care more about your values than your appearances and spend time with people you can be yourself with, you not only become more yourself. You also lessen the stress in your life and realize success. Wherever your day may lead, allow yourself to say yes and take the leap to make it happen.