“Not all men, but it’s 97% of women.”
I’m sure you’ve heard of this phrase from the “97% trend” on TikTok. It’s based on an investigation by United Nations women which found that 97% of women aged 18-24 have been sexually harassed in the UK. The movement was started with the intent to bring attention to the women who are a part of this 97%, but has also sparked a lot of controversy and discussion.
In the midst of this movement, I’ve heard and seen some extremely devastating comments; “It can’t be 97% of women” or “how many of those women lied” or “this trend is invalid because it’s painting a bad picture for all men.” The truth is, a man will never understand the social realities that come with being a woman. The fear we live with when walking down a dark alley at night, the need to hold our keys in our hands, call a friend when we walk to our cars after work, or the worry that we carry every time we leave the house because what we wear might be considered consent in a man’s eyes. I’ve heard so many people say that a woman who wears revealing clothing is “asking for it.” In what world does the way I choose to dress give you consent to do what you want to my body? I dress the way that I do because I like it, not for your attention. Yes, it is not ALL men, but it is ENOUGH women. 97 %; that is 97% too high. Not one woman should have to endure the pain of sexual harassment. That is not to say that men don’t go through the same thing, because they do suffer from sexual harassment. Women can also be perpetrators of sexual harassment and assault, but the reality is that the fear that women live with will never be understood by men.
This movement was not meant to undermine men and the struggles they face with sexual harassment and it is not trying to blanket all men under one stereotype. The point is to say that there are enough women that are facing this struggle, meaning there are enough men that are committing these acts of sexual violence, and this needs to change. These men need to be educated. If you are one of the men saying that you are against this movement because it paints a bad picture for all men, then you are a part of the problem. We are simply trying to advocate for women and open a safe place for them to share their stories. By saying that this trend is wrong because it places all men under the assumption that they are sexual assaulters, you are invalidating these women’s stories. We have made it very clear that it is not ALL men, we are trying to get the point across that it is ENOUGH men. It is enough men, that 97% of women have experienced sexual harassment.
Instead of trying to contradict this movement or trying to invalidate a women’s story, try educating yourself. It is not a woman that should suffer the consequences of the malicious acts of some man. It is those men that need to be educated on what consent truly means and what it feels like to live in the world of a woman. It is those men that need to learn respect and that no means no, even if she said yes originally. This trend is a way for us to unite as a society and to empower women or any victims of sexual violence. It is a way for us to place accountability on the sexual assaulters of our society and to educate them to do better. This was never meant to accuse all men and it was never meant to invalidate the men who suffer from experiences with sexual assault, the point was to start a conversation that is long overdue.
If you are someone who has not supported or posted about these issues, slut-shamed a woman for what she wears, used her clothes as consent, said a woman is “asking for it,” sexually harassed a woman, or invalidated and accused a woman of lying about her experience, then take a moment to educate yourself. Take a moment to ask yourself what is the reality of a woman and what can I do to change that reality into a safer one?
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