Last year, as all of my friends were choosing who they wanted to room with at their respective colleges, I was living in fear of two small words, “Random Roommate.” Is the phrase “living in fear” slightly dramatic, you may ask? NO. I was SO scared about who I would be rooming with this year. What if she hated me? What if she hated the music I listened to? What if we were complete opposites? While all of my friends were hand-picking people who they felt that they would get along well with, I was just left to wonder and over-think the entire situation… and that is never a good thing for me.
Luckily for me, once roommates were assigned and my roommate and I began to talk, we realized that we had a lot in common. Now, here we are. My roommate has become one of my best friends and I absolutely love her to death. She and my two incredible suitemates, always keep me laughing. We tell each other everything and we all just “get” each other!
While I could not ask for a better living situation, I know that some girls at Wake might be struggling this year with their roommate or roommates. It doesn’t matter whether you are a freshman or a senior, sometimes you just don’t get along. In order to keep the peace in your room, I have a few recommendations.
Schedule time alone in your room: If at all possible, try to talk to your roommate about spending time in the room alone. Sometimes everyone just needs a break. It’s likely that at some point during the day, your roommate will have a class and you won’t. Maybe that is your time to just relax and de-stress in your room. However, you will have more busy days. On those days, maybe you could each get one hour alone in the room to just calm down after a stressful day at Wake. My roommate has to study in the library because it helps her focus. While she’s there I study in our room. Being in a comfortable place calms me down.
Set clear rules: Do you have a problem with guys sleeping over? Tell your roommate. Do you need a spotless room in order to focus? Can you study with the TV on or music playing? These issues and many others should have been addressed at the beginning of the semester in the roommate agreement, however, it’s possible that what you both said could be forgotten. It could be a good idea to revisit some basic rules if you’re truly struggling.
Don’t be passive aggressive: If you have an issue with something your roommate has been doing, just tell her. Being honest now, will not be worse than an explosive fight later on in the semester or even the year. By talking things out, you’ll avoid dragging the rest of your hall into your drama as well. It might seem difficult at first, but once an open relationship with good communication is established, it will get easier.