College is the time for us to discover who we are as people, to learn things about ourselves that we were too scared to know about in high school and to get out of our comfort zones and embrace a new version of ourselves. Through these four years of college, some of us find a significant other with whom we embark on this journey, but for some of us, we spend these four years going through this journey alone and wondering why we are doing it alone and why we aren’t dating around. I’m here to tell you that it OK to be alone, and it’s OK to not be dating anyone. Take this opportunity to date yourself.
I didn’t realize what dating yourself meant until my best friend got engaged last October. I was thrilled for her because she had found the man of her dreams, but I won’t lie and say I didn’t sit around for a little bit wondering when my man was going to show up. And the truth was, I didn’t need him to show up. I needed to show up.
You see, ladies, we live in a society where if we aren’t dating, people accuse you of not wanting to date or accuse you of pushing away every guy that might come your way. And, let’s be honest, half of the time it’s just because the guy doesn’t meet our Chuck Bass standards with the smolder and the deep voice. But for four years, we should take the time to figure ourselves out and be true to who we are because when we find out who we are as women, that’s when we can decide who will truly compliment us as a life partner.
So, my advice to you as a fellow woman who has never dated in her entire life is to push yourself out of your comfort zone and try things that you normally wouldn’t try. That club that you thought you would never join in high-school, but now that you’re in college, it seems pretty cool to you? Do it. You want to go to Walmart and get donuts at midnight? Do it. You worked your butt off this week and want to buy yourself something nice? Do it. You don’t feel like putting on makeup and giving your face a break? You’re not out here trying to impress anyone but yourself, girl. Do it. You want to lay in your bed and binge-watch that show on Netflix on Friday night? Pop some popcorn, order a pizza and do it.
What I’m trying to tell you is don’t think you need a guy with you in order to take on the next four years of your life. Be the independent woman inside of you that is dying to be free. Unleash her. Of course, it’s completely OK to get down when you see your friends around you dating and mingling with tons of guys, but know that it’s not because you aren’t good enough. You’re good for you, and maybe over the next four years, you need to learn what that means. So, date yourself. You’ll be happier that you did.
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