I figure the first thing most people learn in a foreign language is something generic like, “Where is the bathroom?” or, “How do you get to ____?” For me, it was, “Je suis allergique aux crustaces, poisson, aux oeufs, et aux produits laitiers.” If you’re like me and can’t speak French without a guidebook, that sentence translates into, “I’m allergic to shellfish, fish, eggs, and dairy products.”
Yep, believe it. I’m spending a quarter (11 weeks) in France—the land of soft cheeses, quiche, and fish. I’m terribly excited to be here, but the one thing I’m not excited about is the possibility of landing in a hospital because I couldn’t communicate well enough.
Today was day two in France. After a long night of trying to correct jet lag (11.5 hours of sleep!), I, along with my group studying “Primate and Human Evolution,” headed to the University of Chicago Paris Center to get acquainted with our commute and the neighborhood surrounding the Center. The staff passed out cell phones, and we were left to chat for a bit. Soon enough, there it was—the awkward silence. So, because I’m of the “safety-first” variety, I did it. I asked the “pin-myself-as-that-weird-girl” question:
“Do any of you know how to use an Epi-Pen?”
The answer was thankfully yes, but then there was the necessary explanation that followed. Fish and shellfish are lethal, eggs are okay if they’re baked, but not in large quantities (i.e. no quiche, but bread is okay), and dairy is more of a sensitivity issue—keep me away from soft cheeses and dairy in its liquid form and I’m usually okay in terms of needing to pull out the Benadryl.
In typical French fashion, not only did we tour the city, but we also wined and dined. The wine was safe, but the meal was another story entirely. I stuck closely to the director of students so that she could explain what I could and could not eat to the waitresses.
[Fun fact: It’s extremely difficult to be a vegetarian in France, let alone someone with food allergies, which is practically unheard of.]
I wasn’t the girl that could just check the vegetarian box, so when the waitress heard what I was allergic to, she said truthfully, “I don’t know if we can feed you. Can you eat plain vegetables?” I swear she breathed a sigh of relief when I explain that baked eggs were okay, so I could eat pasta.
It was, needless to say, a bit of an adventure. Thankfully, I can eat butter because everything here is drenched in it. I said no dairy and got a plate of spinach, green beans, and pasta, all cooked in butter. My appetizer was plain lettuce and tomatoes with oil as dressing. Dessert for me was fruit salad, which might I add was delicious! For the most part, everyone else had tuna as an appetizer (thank goodness I asked; I thought it was prosciutto); scallops and a very creamy risotto as the main course; and custard topped with whipped cream and a macaron for dessert.
Don’t get me wrong; I’m certainly not complaining! My food was fantastic and probably better for the walking in heat that ensued, but I didn’t realize just how difficult it would be to get my point across when dining out. Should I say that I’m essentially a meat-eating vegan, and that no, meat does not include fish? Should I just give them a list of my allergies and read their expressions to see if I need to suggest a dish? I think I’ll start with the latter and hopefully improve as I learn the language. Wish me luck!