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What’s Distance Got To Do With It?

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at U Conn chapter.

So, senior year of high school is over. You have your big prom, graduation and then the parties that follow all summer long. Everything is great; you are living the carefree lifestyle, getting that dearly missed tan, hanging with friends… falling in love…Then the countdown starts as reality kicks in and everyone starts packing up for college. Your friends start popping you with the question “So when are you guys going to break up?! I mean you both are going to different schools…” You just sit there in confusion of your own destiny as you analyze your Facebook timeline. Couples who just dated for the summer are splitting, couples who have dated all of high school have split…shoot…

Well, I have good news. Forget all that pish posh stuff you have heard about dropping your high school sweetheart in order to truly live your college life and forget all the rumors about how distance and separation ruins connection. It is all just a bunch of nonsense coming from people who have not experienced a relationship worth the while. Lucky for you, (yes, you) here are some helpful tips, or so-called “Beating the Distance 101” on how to keep a relationship going while you and your significant other are separated.

1. The most important key in making a long distance relationship work is trust. There is no way you can really make any relationship work if you don’t trust your partner. Trust entails knowing what your relationship boundaries are (open, dating, boyfriend-girlfriend etc.), and knowing one another’s characteristics (loyal, flirtatious, respectful etc.).

2. Stay in touch. Just because you may not get to see your partner every day does not mean that they are partially out of your life. Keep them updated with what is going on throughout your day or after a long week. You can easily communicate with people these days through text, phone, Facebook, Facetime, Skype etc. Keeping in contact with your partner may make it seem like they are not so far away and that they are still a big part of your life.

3. “Indulge” in one another when you reunite. Meaning, take as much of an advantage of the time you get to be together! Do not spend as much time fighting over if you are going to watch football or Gossip Girl that night. Rather, get all fancy and go out for a nice dinner date or have a casual night and grab some fro-yo or ice cream and cuddle up to a movie. Yes, it will be hard not seeing each other for a certain amount of time, but that only makes seeing one another again that much better.

4. Do not feel like just because you have a boyfriend (or girlfriend) you are in a “no going out zone”. Girls in relationships can still have fun! … Just be smart about it. I don’t think your significant other would like to see pictures of you posted on Facebook from last night with your double-stuffed push up bra, lacy V-neck and miniskirt. To avoid a fight, just don’t.

5. Remind one another about why you are committing to the long distance relationship in the first place. This can be as simple as texting one another saying “Hey! I hope you have a great day. I love you and cannot wait to see you.” Who doesn’t love when their day gets started this way? Even better when it is not just from your mom…

6. Surprise your significant other. (Maybe not by randomly visiting, especially if you’re over 200 miles apart.) But sending letters, flowers, or small gifts is a form of your presence and acts as a friendly reminder that you are thinking of them, and going above the step of words and technology to let your partner know how much you care for them. By missing someone or when someone misses you those random emails from your mailroom saying you have a delivery could brighten you or your partner’s whole day up.
 

Caitlin is a Communication major with minors in Sociology and Women's Studies at the University of Connecticut. She has always loved to write, but she caught the advertising bug at UConn and now dreams of creating ads that people will always remember. When she's not studying mass media or reading advertising blogs, Caitlin loves making collages, riding horses, and surprising people!