We all spend a significant chunk of time worrying about guys. And while having a boyfriend seems like every collegiette’s™ dream, guys have a tremendous capacity to make us less and less independent. Don’t get me wrong; I believe in true love and am a hopeless romantic at the end of the day, but that doesn’t mean we need a guy to make us happy! Here are 10 reasons why you can be single and still love it.
- You don’t have to take the time out of your day to do things for him. The not-so-single ladies spend lots of time doing various things for their beaus; his laundry, cleaning his room, taking care of him when he drank too much. As women, we are biologically inclined to want to take care of others, often at the expense of taking proper care of ourselves. When small favors for him add up it means more time on him and less time on you. That’s not what you want! College is an awesome time for discovering yourself. So man or not, make sure there’s always room for some me-time.
- You need to truly be happy with yourself before you can be happy with someone else. Take it from Hills’ alum, Lo Bosworth inher book, The Lo-Down, “if you’re unhappy with yourself, because you’re fulfilling his needs rather than your own, how will you have a happy relationship? It’s impossible!” If your self-esteem depends on him in order for you to be happy, you could be setting yourself up for disaster. Hate to be frank, but most relationships end in a break up. If you have the possibility of losing your one source of self-esteem, your future days aren’t looking too bright. As a single gal, you can fully focus on yourself. Start by writing a list about characteristics you like about yourself (like my girl, Lo suggests).
- You are totally free to flirt with other guys. Everyone flirts. It’s fun, and there are a lot of good-looking guys out there. When you’re single, you can flirt with whomever you want, and don’t have to feel one bit of guilt. Flirting is awesome because you get to meet all kinds of different people with different backgrounds. Not feeling it? Well, move on and talk to someone else! No hard feelings; nobody gets hurt. Chances are you aren’t going to meet the love of your life at a bar in college, but you do get to figure out what you like and what you don’t like in guys.
- You can have your own friends. Friendships and relationships often come at odds with one another. When you are single, there isn’t that doubt of what will happen to your friendships, because they aren’t based on a romantic relationship. True friends are there for you, no matter your relationship status.
- You don’t have to worry about your family liking him. Like friendships, family and boyfriends often come at odds with one another, too. Your family loves you. They want you to find the guy that’s right for you, and they don’t care if you are single. They would much rather you be a strong, smart, independent woman than be completely dependent on a guy.
- More time to focus on school. Though we sometimes forget it, we are in college to learn and get a degree! With boyfriends, it’s easy to find an excuse to study for that exam tomorrow. So take advantage of the free time and hit the books, ladies!
- More time to focus on hobbies. Cheesy as it sounds, our extra curriculars are a big part of the college experience. They help us meet new people, get involved on campus and add a great boost to our resumes. It’s no stretch of the imagination to see how a boyfriend is like an extra curricular too – just not one that provides the resume-boosting quality of an on-campus organization!
- Guys love to play the field. Men have always been portrayed as having a fear of commitment. And sadly, stereotypes are there for a reason. Men (especially college guys) figure “what is the point of dating girls when I can just hook up with them, no strings attached?” So why waste time worrying about the best ways to get that oh-so-coveted commitment? When you can’t beat them, collegiettes™, just join them.
- No pressure for physicality. So many girls in relationships feel pressured to move to a certain point physically with their guy after a certain amount of time. Just remember, you should never let anyone pressure you to do something that you don’t want to do. Your body is your own, and anyone who isn’t willing to wait for when you’re ready, isn’t the right guy for you.
- More time to focus on others! Friends often take the back burner when a new boy comes into the picture. But the single gal can make super close bonds with her girl friends without having to worry about balancing the relationships. And giving your attention to others doesn’t stop with just your besties. Volunteering is an awesome thing, and should be an integral part of any collegiate life. Yes, this one comes from Lo, too. Don’t forget about all the wonderful opportunities to help out the organizations that need your time most, especially during the holiday season!
Never feel down about not having a man again. As much as we all think about how nice a boyfriend would be, don’t forget about all the pluses of being a single lady! So, blast that coveted Beyonce hit we all love and be proud of your Facebook status; college is the best time in your life to be single and loving it!
Further Reading and Empowerment:
Follow @TheSingleWoman on Twitter (Kim Kardashian is a follower!)
The Lo-Down by Lo Bosworth
The Between-Boyfriends Book by Cindy Chupuck