Picture yourself not really knowing if you will be able to get out the bed in the morning because your body has been inflicted with so much pain and stiffness.
You can’t open a bottle, you can’t get dressed, you can’t walk without limping, and you find yourself embarrassed for the simplest things. Things that everyone should be able to do in the mornings.
Constantly fatigued, prescribed a handful of medications with side effects that will affect your future as well as going through treatments. You begin feeling alone because no one can possibly understand. Before you know it, anxiety and depression have found their way in.
This is all caused by an autoimmune inflammatory disease called Lupus which attacks your body from the inside out and cannot be cured. Selena Gomez has this disease and I too fight this daily battle.
In spite of the disease I have been dancing for 11 years. So most people wouldn’t even know I have it. But this is my own personal way of fighting it because dance is my passion and when I do dance I feel like I become a whole new person.
Selena Gomez recently announced that over the summer she was recovering from a kidney transplant. One of her best friends, Francia Raisa was gracious enough to donate a kidney for support. Selena had released new music however she had shed the spotlight to take time to recuperate. Kidney failure is a usual risk when dealing with Lupus and it can be a very misunderstood disease.
I was diagnosed with Lupus when I was 14. Since, it was in the early stages I didn’t really understand how much it was going to impact my life. But it soon caused me pain and swolleness throughout every joint in my body along with stiffness, fatigue and a limp. Introducing me to the world of medications. Which caused me many long term side effects. Sometimes I had to take six pills a day because one medication cannot stand alone in the Rheumatology world.
When I reached my Sophomore year of highschool I missed a lot of class because I was constantly going to Remicade treatments and they usually made me tired. What really touched me during that time was the cancer patients that I would meet, and how happy they would be to talk with me and be there. I adored the nurses and appreciate my mother for always taking off work to be there for me. Especially, since I made her sit through the same movie, Remember the Titans, with me over and over again which is still my favorite movie to this day.
But overall it was a really humbling experience.
Fast forwarding to when I started college, I no longer had the doctor that I was diagnosed with in high school. It took me maybe a year to find a good doctor that was willing to listen so I began receiving improper medical advice.
When your body becomes immune to a medication it is no longer as useful as it once was. So, my spring semester of freshman year I became extremely frustrated. I went from pretty much doing everything my former doctor once said and having a controlled Lupus, to an extremely painful flare up as if I had been just diagnosed.
I began to cut class and became less motivated because that was only the smallest of my worries.
Sometimes I often wonder why me? Why did I have to fight this fight? But I realized God gives you battles that only you are strong enough to fight.
Since then, I have gotten older and more experienced with the disease and I no longer rely on the help of harmful medications. Everyday I am looking for natural ways to relieve and better myself.
Unlike me, Selena has never shied away from her battle. Instead she shares it with the world and uses it as inspiration for others. This is beautiful to me because it shows me that it does not have to be a flaw, it can be used as triumph. This is because everyday we’re winning. When I keep dancing and she keeps entertaining we are overcoming. And I don’t plan on letting it make or break who I am or who I will be in the future. I learned, “You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have.”
For more information regarding Lupus and finding out how you can support follow the link below.