“I love you” are pretty daunting words. When do you say it? How do you say it? What if I don’t hear it back? If you ask me, I think that love is beautiful and complicated, annoying but necessary. Sometimes, it can be really hard to express it. Most of the time, people express it in different ways, too.
In 1995, a man named Gary Chapman wrote a book called “The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate”. In this book, Chapman goes discusses how people in the world express and experience love in different ways. To be specific, there are five popular ways: words of affirmations, receiving gifts, quality time, acts of service and physical touch.
A lot of the time, people crave a certain type of love. As well, some people are really good at giving out love in a certain way. If you’re curious about your love language, you can take the test here, or read below to find out which suits you best!
Words of Affirmation:
You love when someone uses words and language to make you feel good. Compliments, positive affirmations, or even hand-written notes that let you know how awesome you are can really make your day.
Receiving Gifts:
If you’re this person, you really appreciate it when someone goes out of their way to give you a gift. There’s something about a person thinking of you when they see an item and getting it for you that makes your heart flutter.
Quality Time:
You’re a people person. You just want to be surrounded by the people you love and the people who love you. It doesn’t even matter what you’re doing, so long as you’re doing it together.
Acts of Service:
Sometimes actions speak louder than words. People with this love language go head over heels when a person voluntarily helps them out with the little things in their life. This could be helping with the dishes, folding laundry, or even offering a ride. Little acts make a difference.
Physical Touch:
Pats on the backs, consensual hugs, and back rubs will get you. For you, there’s nothing like feeling the physical touch of someone you love, whether it’s romantic or platonic.
The love languages book was originally written to improve the lives of heteronormative and monogamous couples (as most things usually are). However, through my own experience, I’ve noticed that knowing your love language is useful with some many different types of relationships. The book has even been updated. Get everyone you care about to take the test. It’ll improve your relationship with your BFF, your brother, your co-workers, and even your sports team. And of course you can have more than one love language (in fact, Chapman argues that most people have two main ones). Learning the love languages of the people you care about and your own makes it easier to communicate; it makes it easier to let each other know that you appreciate them, and you like having them around.
The world always needs more love. Do your duty. Take the test.
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