Dear Nice Guys™,
You might not be as nice as you think you are. With the combination of entitlement, low selfesteem, and overall bland personality, there’s no surprise that women don’t find you appealing; and you can’t blame anyone else but yourself for that. If you don’t know if you’re a Nice Guy™ or not, here are some questions you can consider…
• Do you spend more time complaining about not talking to women than actually talking to them?
• Do you blame women for having rational trust issues?
• Do you ever imply that these women have wronged you for choosing not to date you?
• Do you describe yourself as “nice” in sexist terms?
• Do you put down women for choosing other men over you?
• Do you often describe yourself as “one of the good guys”?
• Have you ever expected a relationship from a woman even though you’re not much of a catch anyways?
• Do you resonate with these photographs?
If you said yes to any of these questions, there’s some bad news.You’re a Nice Guy ™.
If you grew up expecting that things were going to be handed to you, then re-evaluate, because people don’t work that way. You don’t expect an employer to give you a job just because you showed up to the interview and you were polite. You need to have qualifications. Being nice/polite isn’t even a qualification, it’s an expectation. You show up with nothing to offer but you still feel entitled to have something handed to you. You approach a woman and expect to get a date without any desirable traits or qualities. If you want women to notice you, elevate yourself higher than just the bare minimum. You’re the one who labeled yourself as a nice guy; it’s a self-given tittle, not an earned one.
Being a genuinely kind person is a wonderful quality. If you keep going on and on about how nice you are, you should wonder why everyone needs to be told that by you. If your main argument for convincing a women to date you is “…but I’m so nice to you”, try again. You’re boasting that your main quality is the bare minimum requirement. It’s like if your classmate brags about getting a “C-“ on a term paper. Most of the men you call “douchebags” are just normal men that have more to offer than just being “nice.” They pass the minimum requirement by having confidence and a sense of humour, among other qualities. They know that it’s going to take more than a compliment and opening the door for her to get a date.
Question: When you fail an exam, do you blame the test itself or do you blame yourself for not studying enough? It’s easier to shift the blame to the test so you feel relieved from any responsibility. You’re quick to blame women for not noticing you, or the so-called “douchebags” that these seemingly gullible women always seem to fall for. Don’t be mistaken, there are real douchebags out there. Although, it seems that you label every man who is more successful with women as a terrible person. Open your eyes! They’re not disrespecting us. They’re treating us just as nicely as you claim you’re treating us. Maybe you shouldn’t shift the blame to the women who are not paying attention to you, or the men who are more successful in dating than you. You need to shift the attention on improving and getting to know yourself. Nice guys: it’s not them, it’s you. Stop blaming others for your lacklustre love life. Take a good look at yourself and ask: “what more can I offer other than being nice?” You got the basics, now it’s time to upgrade. Explore your personality and what you have to offer aside from being nice.
Learn to love yourself before you expect another person to love you.
Sincerely,
Women Everywhere