The Academy Awards...sucked

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Despite the fact that this year’s Academy Awards show drew in 4% more viewers than last year’s, it was probably one of the most boring telecasts I’ve seen in awhile (in fact, I think I would have rather watched a golf tournament -- and that’s saying a lot). As much as I hate to say it, Billy Crystal is no longer as funny as he used to be. The show opened with a pre-taped short that included Crystal poking fun at all of the Best Picture nominees, and admittedly this was probably the best joke of the night. Following this, there were a few jokes made that garnered nothing more than a chuckle. Most notably, Crystal poked fun at Jonah Hill’s weight by making a remark about how he may be interested to know there would be cupcakes after the show. Aside from this being in poor taste, it was just...not funny. The musical number was, without a doubt, worst of all considering you could understand almost nothing of what was being said. Thankfully, the rest of the show featured little of Crystal (although he did make a reference to ‘When Harry Met Sally’ later on that was mildly humorous. Emphasis on the mildly.)

            As for the winnings, I (along with America) was a little bit disappointed. Supporting Actress went to Octavia Spencer, which was both unsurprising and completely well deserved. Christopher Plummer, better known as Captain Von Trapp from ‘The Sound of Music,’ took Best Supporting Actor, which was also to be expected. The real surprise came with Best Actress; Meryl Streep won, clinching her third Oscar win and stealing the rug out from underneath Viola Davis. Without a doubt, Davis was the fan favorite, and I personally was sad to see her lose to Streep. Her performance as Aibileen Clark in ‘The Help’ was unbelievably moving, and I was sad to see her leave without an Academy Award for it. In a complete turn of events (not), ‘The Artist’ stole the show with Best Actor for Jean du Jardin and Best Picture. My thoughts on this are pretty well known (I think the entire film was a ploy to rake in the awards) but I will comment no further...
            Lastly, the fashion. There was the really good, and the really bad. Without a doubt, Jessica Chastain, Ellie Kemper, and Milla Jovovich stole the show for best dressed. Gwyneth Paltrow was wearing something that looked like a ‘Star Wars‘ getup gone wrong, and as much as I loved the color of Emma Stone’s dress, the bow seemed a little... awkwardly placed. Kristen Wiig’s dress was gorgeous, yet the color unquestionably washed her out. And to the actress from ‘The Artist‘ who was nominated for ‘Best Actress:‘ what the hell were you thinking?

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