I like to think that I have adjusted pretty well to college life. I’ve made new friends, I go to my classes, and I even do my homework. I’ve also embraced the new independence that comes with leaving my hometown and coming to live in a city I barely know. So far, so good. Except for one thing: boys. Being a former private school girl, I have been immersed in an academic culture consisting of only girls for all of my high school experience. Yes, I had boys that were friends and even some that were more than friends, but I am still in a slight sense of awe that I have boys in my classes, in my dorm, where I eat… they’re everywhere. It’s actually a bit overwhelming.
With this adjustment, I failed to realize how different the culture of college hookups is compared to those experienced in high school. I wish this difference was something I had known coming into college. Luckily for you, I have decided to take what I have observed so far in college to try and give some insight to those who might be struggling with the concept of a college hookup and what it entails.
First things first: what actually is a “hookup?” This term is not only vague but can lead to assumptions of one’s actions that are completely false. All throughout high school, a hookup was defined as making out with someone and if more was done, it was specified. When a friend said they had “hooked up” with someone at last night’s party, it was mutually assumed that they just made out. Welcome to college, where hooking up is defined as not only making out but also everything and anything, most likely including sex. This was something completely new to me. Because of this new definition, I have had to be cautious of throwing this term around.
In most cases in high school, random hookups seldom occurred. People were usually ‘talking,’ which meant that it was a constant hookup and they spoke everyday. It was also more normal than not to have couples or people that were ‘together,’ aka seen as couples, to have a consistent hookup. Sporadically, friends would have a random hookup and either end up ‘talking’ after it occurred or just never saw them again. Coming to college with this mentality, I just figured that the norm I was used to still applied. That is, I could potentially have a random hookup and either a) we would still communicate after it occurred or b) I would never see them again. Well, I was wrong on both counts. Not only does the person you hooked up with, at least nine times out of ten, never speak to you afterwards, BUT you also usually end up seeing them… everywhere. You would think at a school made up of about 28,000 students you would never have to worry about this. What’s worse is that awkward passing where they don’t even look at you, let alone speak to you. Talk about uncomfortable.
Lastly, however, I can see that sex is a more viable option in college. Your unlimited freedom gives you the ability to make all of your own decisions, especially those pertaining to sex. It is also seen as being not as big of a deal as it was in high school. One-night stands are not something many people I knew in high school experienced, anyway. Before you do something that you may regret, think of the aftermath of putting yourself in such a situation. Otherwise, if you’re all for it, be smart and prepare yourself for what could come the morning after.
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