Ending something that never even started is actually possible and harder than it seems. Some girls are secretly the “other girl.” And when a girl is the “other girl,” this means she is pursuing some form of relationship with a man that has a girlfriend, or in some serious cases a wife. Sometimes they know it and sometimes they don’t. In my case, I had an idea, but I chose to ignore it. I didn’t want it to be true because I thought this guy was a great guy.
It started as a summer fling and continued into the school year. He would use lines like, “baby I can’t wait to see you” or “baby I miss you,” when we would go a few days without seeing each other. But the line that stuck with me the most, “I promise I am not like all those other guys, and I am going to prove it to you.” For a while he did and I believed it. Things with us went to the next level and it seemed great, but then the rumors started. The first girl I heard about I confronted him, and also with the second one. Each time he had an excuse for why these rumors were started. It was either, I misunderstood what was being said or the girl was just trying to make his life difficult by starting rumors.
So, naturally I started looking around and trying to figure out the truth. I added him on Facebook and he wouldn’t accept my friend request. But he accepted my roommate (I don’t think he knew it was her), so we were able to creep. His wall was covered in comments from a girl claiming to be his girlfriend. So again, I confronted it and he told me that they broke-up, and that she was crazy and obsessive. The proof was right in front of me, but he denied it, so I believed it. After that we stopped hanging out as much and only heard from each other at night. We only hung out when it was convenient for him. This continued for over a year. The whole time I believed that I was the only girl, even though the rumors continued and more, and more girls started coming out saying they were with this guy.
Recently, I found out the truth. After some creeping and social media detective work, I found out that the crazy girlfriend that he “didn’t have” was now moving here in a month… and moving in with him. They have been dating seriously for over three years. Once, I figured this out I confronted him AGAIN and told him everything I knew. To no surprise, I have not heard back from him since. He has been caught and now he doesn’t know what to do. He doesn’t care enough anymore to defend himself or even apologize.
Many people look down on the “other girl,” and think it is just some promiscuous girl trying to ruin relationships. In reality though, the girl is blinded by something she considers special in this guy. No one wants to believe that he is using us and lying to us the whole time. We don’t want to believe that he has a girlfriend and that we are in fact the, “other girl.” Every girl wants to feel wanted and once a guy makes you feel that way it’s hard to believe there is bad in him. I have always been told to follow my gut feeling and not my heart. Being the “other girl” has shown me that. If the proof is there then take it, and run…run fast. No one wants to be the “other girl” because it shows that you are not good enough in his eyes to be the only girl.
Once you realize that you are the “other girl” there is nothing you can do, but be done. It may be hard at first, but in the long run you will be better for it. And honestly, if he is going to cheat on his girlfriend with you, chances are he is going to cheat on you with someone else. Every girl deserves to be treated like a princess, and being the “other girl” is far from that. Realize how important you are and what you deserve, then you will find the right guy.