During the holidays times can be tough. Not because of school per say but its because some people don’t have a family to celebrate with and thanksgiving can be crucial. For me personally it is because I come from a divorce family and it’s easier to say that I’ve enjoyed thanksgiving and Christmas a lot more when I was younger.
Research shows that 50 percent of marriages end in divorce and mine was one of them, so as a child of divorce. When you are a child or more so an adult of divorce you have to make a decision on whom you are going to spend the holidays with. I remember when I was younger I would spend thanksgiving and Christmas with my mom and I would spend New Years Eve with my father.
In my personal experience it can be tough and a struggle its not always half-full in fact I always feel completely full. My mom always made sure that I have everything I needed. For the holidays we didn’t always have our whole family like we once did when I was younger and sometimes life didn’t always play along.
Now I know not everyone is so lucky. We lead different journeys and its hard going through this kind of stuff when you are supposed to be the most joyful. So here are some tips that I found through a few websites that I want to recommend if you feel like you’re going through this alone.
- One of the first things I would recommend if you still feel pain and anger toward your parents is that you must forgive. Yes, it can be hard but forgiving your parents will release the bitterness you have holding on inside of you but trust me from experience it will get better.
- My next tip is to make unity a number one priority. When you are an adult you start to understand things that you never understood when you were younger. For example, we are taught in movies that the women your dad marries after divorcing your mom is the wicked witch but it’s not true. It’s quite opposite.
- When having divorce parents scheduling can be difficult. One parent wants you on black Friday then the other wants you on thanksgiving it can be exhausting. So I suggest you have a date and time when you have a day with your father and his family then do the same thing with your mother. It will make the thanksgiving and the transitions smooth and less drama to deal with.
- Be grateful. I know it can be hard to be grateful when your parents aren’t together but to be completely honest would you rather be celebrating with both parents on separate occasions or not having a parent at all? The way I see it is you get double the love! And twice amount of food.
So conclude this I just want to speak on personal experience that while you’ve experienced your parent’s divorce as a child or you are barely going through this awful transition there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I know that it sounds so cheesy but its true. Just because your parents or mine got divorce doesn’t mean that you’ll end up divorced. Keep your chin up.
HAVE A HAPPY THANKSGIVING!