K.A.R.M.A. Those five little letters can really get to you, especially if you’re in a dating slump similar to the one I find myself in now. Can one bad move in a previous relationship screw you over in the future?
Joey* and I had been friends since we were freshman. And when I say friends, I actually mean friends. He helped me with my guy problems and I gave him advice when it came to all his ladies that came and went. And believe me. There were plenty of them. But no matter how many girls he went through, I was always there for him. We could sit and chat for hours without any pressure on hooking up.
One night, desperate for a date to a party, I called Joey and begged him to come with me. We had a great time, as usual, I updated him on my love life (or lack thereof) and he told me how excited he was about his new girl. He swore that this time would be different- he wouldn’t rush things and was honest with her. She had a problem with Joey coming with me to the party, but he assured her that we were just friends. He really liked her.
But the drinks were flowing, cigarettes puffing away, and Joey’s arms became a permanent fixture around my waist. When we danced, I caught myself getting a little too close. Maybe it was because I had always felt comfortable around Joey, but my head nestled its way into Joey’s neck. It was all downhill from there.
When it came time to head home, Joey didn’t want to part ways yet. I didn’t want him to
move his hands from my waist. We headed back to his house for a post-game. I knew it was a dangerous road to go down, but I couldn’t stop myself. And of course, like any good romance novel, it started to rain on the way home. Beer plus summer rain plus a desperate girl plus a cute boy who was holding my purse equals disaster. As Joey kissed me, his girlfriend’s face popped into my head.
But I kept kissing him.
The next morning was the classic “awkward wake up next to someone who you didn’t mean to kiss the night before” situation. We sat in silence as Joey drove me to my car. When we pulled up, he made me promise that we’d stay friends. He followed that with “I’m going to tell my girlfriend we hooked up.”
I believe that Joey did the right thing by telling the girlfriend. And trust me, I felt like a complete piece of shit in the months that followed. Joey eventually became “facebook official” with his new girl. He then defriended me, ignored my text, and didn’t come to my birthday party (which he never would have missed before the incident.)
I’ll take responsibility for my actions. To put it dramatically, I was the other woman. I went against girl code and in the end, screwed myself over.
In the end, I believe in karma. Since then, I’ve been involved with a neurotic med student who just wanted to be friends (only after he got my shirt off), a slack-ass frat bro who just wanted to be friends (only after he got my shirt off), and a dorky business major from out of state who wanted more than friendship (but lived eight hours away). To say that my dating life has been rough is an understatement.
So you tell me. Is karma messing with me? Joey’s girlfriend is probably sitting pretty- laughing at my misery. So I’m going to go with a big oh hell yeah.
*Names have been changed so I don’t freak anybody out.