1. The “Yeah I’m in Farmer” Guy
– Expect sex the first night
– Only talks about his summer internship with Deloitte
– Wears a Comfort Colors shirt to the bars
– Pays the $6 cover to Brick with Daddy’s money
– Voted for Trump and isn’t ashamed to admit it
2. The “You Thought He Liked You But He Just Wanted Your Body” Guy
– You stay up into the wee hours of the morning talking about nothing but everything
– Says he’ll visit you over J-term (doesn’t)
– You go on late night runs to Pulley together
– Makes out with another girl at New in front of you
– Makes you feel psychotic for thinking it was more than a hook up
– Says “can we still be friends though?” but he never texts you back
3. The “Idk Guys, I Think He’s Gay” Guy
- Dresses impeccably
– Compliments your top not your boobs
– Works at a Kofenya
– You actually enjoy spending time with him
– Expects a cooler and nothing else for his formal
4. The “Beer Goggles” Guy
– You only talk to him when your 1.5 trashcans in
– You don’t make eye contact when you see each other at King
– You know his drink order but not his major
– You’ve never seen his room with the lights on
5. The Loyal Follower Guy
– Helps you with your MBI 111 homework
– Has joked about kissing you under the arch, but is it really a joke???
– Takes care of you first (;
– Picks you up at another frat when you need to be walked home
– Comfortable but not exciting
6. The “Victory Lap” Guy
– He’s covering all the bases this time around
– Knows his time is limited, so gets straight to the point
– He’ll take you to Paesanos not Pulley
– Remembers when Shriver was the student center
– Has switched his major three times
7. The “Friends Who Make Out” Guy
– You have to check his insta before you text him to make sure he doesn’t have a girlfriend
– It’s okay to hook up on day four of your shaving schedule
– You can expect a high five afterwards
– You split the bill at QB
– You know he’ll never ask you to be his girlfriend and it’s probably better that way
8. The Second String Hockey Player
– Has VIP at Brick and is clearly underage
– Wears HIS jersey out
– Kicks you out early because he has practice at 8 a.m.
– Swears he’ll start next week