Femininity, Football, and My 10-Year-Old Sister
My youngest sister is kind of a badass. At ten years old, she is quick-witted and spunky. Her style is uniquely her own: a blend of trendy patterned pieces, utilitarian athletic wear, and licensed apparel (these days it skews towards Star Wars). She takes requests from her friends as to what patterns she should shave into her undercut. She is loath to wear a dress, and she plays football.
Football has captivated my sister in a way that no other sport has been able to. Since she started playing a year ago, I have seen her grown stronger and healthier. She bragged to me recently that she would soon be more muscular than I am. When talking about football, she carries herself with a certain confidence. She delights in participating in the pump-up chants before every game with her teammates. Through football, she has absolutely blossomed.
In pads and helmets, my sister is nearly indistinguishable from her male teammates. The boys clearly don’t see her as different from them in any meaningful way. They celebrate her successes and support her slip-ups. Her coaches often commend her on her fearlessness on the field. She’s a hit among my friends, who agree with me that she’s the coolest grade schooler in the Midwest (and maybe the world).
Unfortunately, the question of whether girls and young women should be able to play football at all is hotly contested. This gem from Fox News features a news correspondent’s opinion that allowing girls to play football is an attack on gender roles. He says, “I think this is more of the wussification of American men. We’re blurring the gender lines to the point where you can’t tell who’s a boy and who’s a girl anymore.” Another man cites boys’ “impure thoughts” as a reason that girls should be banned from playing on a predominately male football team. He goes on to joke that even grown men have impure thoughts, and that he was having them “right now.”
Both of these lines of reasoning are utterly ridiculous. The first, that football is somehow inherently masculine, is predicated on archaic reasoning. Most sports were historically male-dominated, but that doesn’t stop women now from picking up basketball or soccer. If the argument is that women are too delicate for such violent sports, then what do we have to say about women’s rugby? Surely the risk of injury rivals that of football. The second point, that girls should be banned from sports to protect the purity of young boys, is equally absurd. Being on a team with girls, in fact, can teach boys that girls aren’t so different after all. We need to start teaching boys and young men that they are in control of their actions. They can be mature enough to refrain from behaving inappropriately just because they find someone attractive. Having female teammates is an incredible tool for teaching this valuable lesson.
Getting to see my sister come into her own through football has been a blessing. She is never more herself than she is on the field. Through this incredible sport, she is growing to be a brave, strong, happy, fulfilled kid. I hope that, one day, it won’t be controversial for girls to play football. I hope that girls and young women will one day feel that there are no barriers to what they can explore. Until then, I leave you with a phrase that Maggie taught me: “Let ‘em play, ref. Let ‘em play.”