I remember the days leading up to my freshman year pretty clearly; they were filled with excitement, fear, and worry. All three of these emotions were connected to the notion of making friends. I went to the same school from kindergarten to senior year, so the idea of making friends was one that hadn’t passed through my mind for about 13 years. Of course I become friends with new people over those years, but I never avidly had to try. In the back of my mind, I knew I always had my core group. On move-in day, I shyly met my roommate and quietly got to know her. During the next few days, I got incredibly close to my floor and dorm, some of whom are still my best friends.
I didn’t know much about Lehigh’s Greek life, but I saw it as a chance to meet new people and form new friendships. I could say that I knew the gist of sororities and fraternities, but what I knew was from movies and TV, and I didn’t believe those were the total picture. My friends were more knowledgeable and interested than me, so I just followed them, taking in bits and pieces, and mostly just tried to figure out where I fit in. I went to many fraternity parties, had lunches with different sophomore sorority girls, and talked endlessly about the stigmas associated with each chapter and the hierarchy of Greek life during my first semester at Lehigh.
Once winter break rolled around, my group chats were overtaken by sorority talk, from which sorority was a favorite, to which house was the prettiest, and everything in between. During those weeks at home I really had to contemplate and ask myself “do you want to be in a sorority?” and when I did, I realized my answer was no. What lead me to my decision was one question: How could I pick something as drastic as a sisterhood as the girl I am freshman year? I was already different at winter break, so I could only imagine how different I would be senior year. College is all about new experiences, discovering what you love and hate, struggling to figure out who you are, and there are only four years to do this. I couldn’t grasp the fact that I would make a decision about the rest of my college life with only four months under my belt. A girl, who changes her clothes two to three times before making a choice and then still changes once more before going anywhere, was going to be placed in a chapter for the next three years… I couldn’t see myself doing that.
I came back from break and two of my closest friends were already in sororities, loving their pledge class, their soon to be sisters, and enjoying their pledge events. They made the best decision for themselves.
Finding your “home” is a phrase I have heard tossed around, from my friends in sororities to Instagram posts on bid day. My best friends in Greek life can say they found their home in their chapter, and although I can’t pinpoint something as specific as a sorority to call my home, I know I found a home at Lehigh. My home may not be a house on the hill, but I have found it within my friends, my major, and my extracurricular activities. I don’t look down upon anyone’s vision of his or her home; I just have a different one than many at Lehigh. Discovering where you fit, in a place of 5,000 people, can be daunting, but once you do find your place, whether it be in a sorority or not, it will be one of the happiest moments of your life.
Now, as junior, looking back on my two years, I see how much I have changed, in good ways and some bad. I think I would’ve changed whether I was in Greek life or not, but my change brought me to new avenues in my life that I’m not sure I would have found in a sorority. Yes, there are times I question if I did the right thing by not going through the process, and possibly joining, but in the end I know I did what’s best for me. It’s all about the fit. If you want to join Greek life, do it, and if you don’t, then don’t! I am a proud GDI who on occasion involves herself in Greek life activities, and not just parties because as I have learned from friends, being Greek is so much more than a social calendar.