Not only am I single, but I don’t have any prospects either. I do not want to be set up though. Now any single girl gets this: friends who are in a relationship want to pair off all of their single friends. They may be well meaning but set ups rarely end with a “Hollywood happily-ever-after”.
One time my friend attempted to set me up with her boyfriend’s best friend. This is how these set ups work: the two single friends of the “happy couple” get forced on each other. My set up was far from a Meg Ryan romantic comedy. The “gentleman” that I was set up with was an aspiring rock star/stoner. We didn’t go further than a one time meet. My friend and her boyfriend didn’t last long after that either.
It makes sense that friends who are coupled up want everyone to be as happy as they are (well, at least supposedly). It just becomes a bit much when every time the group goes out, the single friends are told, “We need to get you a guy tonight,” or, “Maybe we’ll find you a hottie.”
Did I choose to be single? Well, no but that doesn’t mean that I want to be set up either. When you’re the type of person who doesn’t ever like to ask for help, set ups and blind dates go against your basic instincts. It feels kind of like cheating at a competition or something. It also feels like the world is telling you that you don’t know how to do this by yourself. It might be true but it sure isn’t something that you actually want to hear. While your friends may not mean to send this message to you it is the message that you receive.
The single girl in me wonders, why is it that I can’t find a guy on my own? Why do I have to rely on my friends’ misguided attempts at being helpful? But what I wonder most is, was there a day in middle school that I missed? Did all the other girls get taught how to navigate the dating scene while I was absent? If so, can someone out there give the notes from that class. It would be super helpful.