Every year I, like many others, dread the holiday parties with the same monotonous string of questions from every single family member, over and over and over again: “What’s your major? How are your classes? Do you have a boyfriend?” Do you have a boyfriend? More often than not, ahem, I mean always, the answer is the same “Fashion Comm, very interesting, and no.” However, this year I have crafted the perfect answer that is straight to the point and eliminates any awkward follow up questions or the worst response in history, the pitying “Don’t worry you’ll find someone.”
This year my answer is as follows: If by boyfriend you mean six classes, two jobs, three clubs, an excellent group of friends, and a smashing sense of humor then yes, yes I do.
The cat has been out of the bag for a while now, I haven’t dated anybody since I graduated high school- and I’m okay with that. It isn’t intentional, but it’s not unintentional. Since I started college, I realized the value of my time and I get to decide how I want to spend it. After a year of talking to dead-ends and boring guys I finally have figured it out. I don’t want to waste my time with insincere people whose values don’t align with my own. I have finally figured out what it is that I want out of a relationship and I don’t intend to settle for any less than what I think I deserve.
This isn’t to say that I’m closed-minded or unwilling to give a new guy a chance. Anyone who knows me knows there is nothing I love more than getting to know someone new. I thrive off of genuine human connection, because of this I have more friends than I ever thought possible. I’ve decided this is what’s best for me, and if there was ever a time to run around and chase my dreams it would be now. I’ve only got four years of college and I would rather spend them achieving my goals and impressing myself than worry about what some guy thinks of my hair.
Since I stopped trying to chase after guys who aren’t all that interesting, I have had more time than ever to start discovering what it is I want out of life. I’ve built numerous genuine relationships with friends that I know will be by my side for the long haul. I’ve learned that while daydreaming about some guy is fun, living today to the fullest is more rewarding than ever. I’ve been on adventures every weekend with new friends and old, from swing dancing and museum hopping, to organizing successful fundraisers and volunteering for incredible causes. I’ve even had time to put a serious dent in finishing Gilmore Girls.
Now, I don’t worry about someday when I finally find the love of my life, I know it will happen one day but that day probably isn’t today. Sure sometimes it sucks being around couples all the time or being a third wheel; yes I will admit that it would be nice to have a boyfriend, but right now I’ve got a person that I genuinely like to be around- and that person is me. I’m slowly discovering that I’ve got what everyone else wants, to be confident in who they are and know that they’re good enough. I’ll buy myself flowers and a cup of coffee because what’s important to me is that I am happy, and that is an invaluable quality that I am not about to waste.