Mastering the Art of Flirtexting

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It is obvious that the media has come to play a large role in our social lives.  Almost half the time now we are communicating by e-mail, text, or Facebook.  Personally, I can’t help but feel relieved when my mom texts me from downstairs that my laundry is ready (get out of bed?  Physically move? Whoa there, I wasn’t going to wear those jeans ‘til Tuesday).
 
All laziness aside, the role of social media has also changed the way we go about pursuing the objects of our affection.  Unless you’re old-fashioned or (gasp!) like to use your cell for its intended use, you no longer follow that old, silly rule from the ‘30’s where a guy will wait three days to call and ask you out on a date.  Just like The Hunger Games is the new Twilight, texting is the new flirting.  But before you hit the unlock button on your Blackberry and send a sweet nothing to your sweet nothing, make sure you’re following these ground rules of your new favorite pastime that is flirtexting...
 
DO play the waiting game

Sometimes, you’ve got to keep a guy waiting.  Guys are all about the thrill of the chase – it just makes dating more interesting!  I wouldn’t wait too long (i.e. ten plus hours).  You don’t want to come off as uninterested once you know you’ve got him, that’s just being a tease!  I personally like to wait a good five to seven minutes before responding to my oh-so-many gentleman callers. 
 
DON’T text him back if you don’t get a response
Never. Ever. Ever.  It’s been seven hours and he still hasn’t responded to your “Hey, what’s up?” text? Let it go.  Yes, there is a 9% chance his phone died, he misplaced it and is now in a raging panic because he can’t text back “nm, u?” but these chances are very slim.  If you’re going to send a second text at all, wait a while (about two to three days).  But if he doesn’t respond to that one, don’t even think about forwarding it thrice!  Unless you want him to rename you in his contact list as “creepy-stalker-clingy-girl.”
 
DO ask him out via text
Asking someone to hang out in person can be nerve-racking.  Texting someone can come off as calm and cool if done correctly.  It’s hard to tell vocal intonation when you read a text, hence, your boy will never know you were on the verge of stuttering when you read the text aloud.  You can be super subtle with this one too.  For example, a text that reads, “I’ll be in South View tonight too, we should meet up!” doesn’t sound too forward and is the perfect invitation to get you two together.
 
DON’T deliberately make a tpyo, add on letterssss, or use an excessive amount of abbrev.
Some girls think adding on seven extra “k’s” to “OK” is cute or cool.  Some guys do not.  Some girls think that, maybe, if they misspell the word ‘Saturday,’ he’ll think they were in a rush and have more important things to do than text him (because no, they didn’t just spend the last three minutes crafting the perfect reply).  Most guys would not have picked up on it and unintentionally misspelled in their next text back.  It doesn’t mat how u typ ur msg, it’s dat u typd it (kudos to those who can decipher that). 
 
DO realize calling him “buddy,” “pal,” or anything of the like will land you in the friend zone
We know you’re just trying to be friendly, but that’s exactly what you’re coming off as – friendly.  Stick to words like “babe,” “cutie,” “you,” or “sexy Taylor Lautner look-a-like contest winner.”  Just don’t be excessive.  Sneaking in a few flirty terms of endearment every once and a while though will definitely get the message across to your guy that you’d rather be more than friends. 

 
DON’T drunk and/or booty text!
Do I need to add another exclamation point?  Though one of the worst rules of texting you could possibly break, it is often the most easily broken.  I get it; it’s late, your inhibitions are low, and the only thing that could top that speedy Jimmy John’s delivery is some lovin’ from the oven of your hottest guy friend.  Resist the urge, collegiettes™!  Not only could you make the future relationship with your guy friend extremely awkward, you (or he) could start to develop real feelings after an occurrence that wouldn’t have happened if technology and sexual desire had never mingled.
 
DO take it as a good sign if you receive a goodnight text
Oh, the goodnight text - a.k.a. the great date follow-up.  It’s really just common courtesy for a guy to text you a short and sweet goodnight message after the date is done (not to mention it makes the butterflies last a little longer).  It also makes it easier for us girls to tell whether or not the guy was really into us.
 
DON’T purposely mis-text
Most girls do this because they’re trying to make the guy jealous or they think it is a cop-out way to strike up a conversation.  Either way, it’s not hard to see through. Haha omg Johnny that was so funny what you did last night!! is not going to land you a date for Friday.  First off, no one really has names like ‘Johnny’ anymore, so I suggest going with a more up-to-date name if you’re going to try and pull this off (Maddox, perhaps?).  Secondly, he may not even reply back and then you are left with your plan blown up in your sent-box.  Or he may actually believe you and take it as you’re playing the field and disinterested in him.                                                                                                 

   
 
Bottom line: flirtexting is fun!  Heck, any form of flirting is!  Just make sure to space out your texts, not come off as a love-crazy psycho stalker, or send something you know you’ll later regret.  Fl1rt txt aw4y <3  

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About The Author

Alexa is a junior from Cream Ridge, New Jersey.  She is studying Media Arts & Design with a concentration in Corporate Communication and minors in Creative Writing and Anthropology.  She works for the JMU Office of Residence Life as a Program Adviser and as the Graphics Editor for The Breeze.  She loves watching The Bachelor, pinning to her fashion boards and running outside.   Alexa aspires to work in the glamouous fashion magazine industry in New York City or LA.