The terms “introvert” and “extrovert” have recently been popularized as people have begun to understand why we think, act, and feel the ways we do, and why they vary so much from person to person. Our culture seemed to place more value on the louder types of people, those who dominate the conversation, a people person! Those are the extroverts, people who gain energy from socializing. But there’s the opposite of those individuals, those who stay away from the center of attention, the softer spoken, usually called “the quiet type”. Those are introverts, people who lose energy from socializing and regain energy by spending time alone. These are only broad definitions of the terms. Here are a few more definitions of introvert:

The most basic definition of an introvert is a person who gains energy from being alone and loses energy in stimulating environments, such as social events

The definition of an introvert is someone who prefers calm, minimally stimulating environments.

in·tro·vert

[ˈintrəˌvərt]

NOUN

1. a shy, reticent person.

introvert

verb in·tro·vert \ ˈin-trə-ˌvərt \

Definition of introvert

transitive verb

: to turn inward or in upon itself: such as

a : to concentrate or direct upon oneself

b : to produce psychological introversion in

With so many definitions of the word, how can one truly define what an introvert is, or even begin to know if they themselves might be introverted?

As an introvert, I’d love to try to break down some of the stereotypes of the introvert. Most would think that an introvert at a party would be the person leaning against the wall at a party. However, the introvert could easily be the “social butterfly” at the party. Being an introvert is about more than spending time alone,  it’s about whether energy is being lost or gained from being around others.

Marti Olsen Laney, psychotherapist and author of The Introvert Advantage stated that “Introversion is a basic temperament, so the social aspect — which is what people focus on — is really a small part of being an introvert,”

Is there a difference between shy and introverted?  Yes! Many people use the terms “introvert” and “shy” interchangeably. They think that all introverts are timid. Both introverts and shy people tend to avoid socializing at times, but we do so for different reasons. Introverts often stay on the sidelines at social events because socializing drains our energy. We must be selective about how much we “put ourselves out there” because we don’t want to crash afterwards. Shy people, on the other hand, avoid socializing out of fear of the unfamiliar. If you’re thinking “I fit into both of those descriptions”,  then you might be introverted and shy. The two characteristics can occur together or separately. This means both introverts and extroverts can be shy.

Are introverts socially awkward?  No! Many people think that “introvert” is synonymous with a cold, uninteresting personality – not the case at all. Introverts are friendly, confident, and interesting too! In a culture that favors extroverts, we have become skilled at wearing a mask of extroversion, even to the point of coming off as extremely outgoing and gregarious! If anything, sometimes introverts are just drained by overwhelming environments, we can become easily drained and not seem socially adept. 

Introversion and extroversion occur on a scale – most, if not all, people have percentages of both. In an extroverted society, it can just seem like people are one or the other, leading introverts to feel as though they aren’t “normal” or accepted. But introversion comes with many unique gifts. The world needs more calm, more quiet, and more depth. Introverts are the best people to provide all that and much more.