Her Campus Logo Her Campus Logo
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Endicott chapter.

Let’s talk about sex, baby!

But, seriously, let’s talk about sex. Leaving the “baby” part aside, let’s have a not so serious sex talk.

Here’s the thing; no one talks about sex. I’m not saying you need to start telling your doctor about the dirty details of your sex life. But, stop and think about how many of your partners you’ve had a conversation with about sex. This is where I laugh, because with most of my partners in the past, I’ve never sat down and had a conversation about what I want or about what I like or don’t like, and that’s crazy to think about. But why is this? Why don’t we talk about sex like we talk  about what kind of pizza we like? We’ve grown up thinking that sex is a biological, physical act and we’ve forgotten that it also impacts our mental health. It’s time for a sexual revolution and this is my sexual intervention for you. Sex is important for your health, just like your vegetables! We’ve always known this about sex, but we’ve  only thought of it in the context of reproduction. If you want you and your significant other to have a healthy, successful relationship, then baby, it’s about time you start talking about sex.

It took me a long time to appreciate sex for what it is, and normalize it in my head; it honestly takes a lot. But here’s what I’ve always thought: sex is a connection you have with another person, and it doesn’t matter if it’s one time or multiple times, you made yourself vulnerable to someone else and they, in-turn, made themselves just as vulnerable to you. So, why is it so easy to get naked in front of someone nowadays, yet so hard to verbalize what we do or don’t like in the bedroom? Because… Communication is becoming nonessential in a world filled with technology. You know I’m right – you can send out a sext as easy as 1,2,3, but when you try to communicate with your partner about sex and words can’t be formed. The bottom line is, you need to start a conversation. Think, “hey, if I can get naked in front of this person, why can’t I tell them that maybe whipped cream would be fun?!” I know what you’re thinking, “but I don’t want to sound like an idiot or hurt their feelings or make them feel like they’re doing something wrong”. Here’s the thing – if someone told you what they like in bed and then you pleased them in a way you never thought you could, they would definitely be pleased and you’d be just as pleased with yourself. I urge you to start a conversation, make sex less awkward! Make it amazing for you and your partner! Punch society in the face and be like “I LOVE SEX, LET’S TALK ABOUT IT!”

At the end of the day, in 2017, sex is no longer taboo. I’ll put it the simplest way possible: sex is like texting. Some people don’t text at all. Some people text a lot. Some people only text occasionally. Whoever we’re texting, we continue that conversation after we’ve been texting. Or, we converse about the topic and then we’ll text about it later. Unlike our texting conversations, we rarely converse about sex before or after it happens. How are you supposed to send a good “text” (wink, wink) if you have no idea what the other person likes to talk about? But really, if you want to be good in bed, it’s easier than you think, just talk to your partner about sex, baby.

 
 
Passionate peer educator and self proclaimed sexpert. I enjoy talking dirty about the anatomy of the human body. More often than not, you'll find me binge watching Ted Talks. Happiest nanny to three wonderful kiddos. And I'll never forget that everyday is a a great day to be a gull.
Just a girl who loves bread, exercise and traveling.