“Will you be my girlfriend?” –Bambi
Dear Bambi,
Bambi is a prince, so I’ll take it into consideration. I think Bambi could treat a girl right if he grew big enough horns. However, my Disney crush has always been Simba from the Lion King. I’m just a Nala looking for her Simba. You’re just Bambi, looking for Bambi’s girlfriend…Faline? I don’t know what kind of name that is. I like the way you think though Bambi. Take love advice from Disney movies instead of romantic comedies. Bambi is the perfect movie to help you tackle your love life in college. Well, maybe not, but we’ll give it a go.
Mr. Owl says to Bambi, Thumper and Flower, “Everyone get’s twitterpated in the spring time!”
(I thought “Flower” was a girl until I was thirteen, I don’t think I’m alone there).
Bambi replies “It’s NOT going to happen to me!”
Mr. Owl then strikes back with a “It can happen to anybody!”
So, what I’m understanding from Mr. Owl is that one day Bambi, Thumper, and Flower will grow out of the “hook up” phase they must be in right now and realize that they may want to start looking for a wifey.
Mr. Owl exclaims, “All of a sudden you just run into a pretty (or handsome) face!”
You’re that handsome face Bambi. I’m sorry I can’t be your girlfriend but I promise you that one day you will get twitterpated by someone who crosses your path or someone will be twitterpated by you. Until then, remember; every day is a great day to be a gull.
(^P.S. Everyone driving around campus looking for a parking spot^)