Men: Can’t live with them, Can’t live without them. As great as they can be, sometimes guys need a reminder of what we find cute and what we can’t stand. I spoke to several Elon University gals and got the scoop on what guys do in some situations that we love and what we can’t stand. So guys listen up and take notes…there might be a test later!
First Meeting:
The first time you meet a guy; many things run through your mind. But it’s his actions that really leave a mark on what we remember.
Likes:
-“I like it when they come over to me and start talking first because it shows me that they are the outgoing type and they took that initiative.”
-“Wit and unexpected humor. It’s always so refreshing and attractive if a guy is naturally funny, without being abashed or holding back because he’s afraid of what the lady might think.”
Dislikes:
– “It’s great to say your interests and stuff, but don’t just go on and on and try to impress a lady, cause it’s not going to work if you keep puffing your chest out.”
– “Don’t start a conversation you don’t want to have”
– “I hate when a guy is so cocky that he thinks he is better than me”
Bottom Line: Be yourself! Be courteous and respectful, and try to get to know us better! But don’t do it so much that we can’t tell if you are just being friendly or being actually interested in us!
First Date:
The first date…or is it?
Likes:
-“ I like when they hold the door open for me. It’s common courtesy”
-“ I like when the guy at least offers to pay. He doesn’t have to pay if the girl completely objects, but the gesture is nice”
-“ I love when they have a plan. If he’s got a plan, it’s awesome!”
Dislikes:
-“ Don’t do a super expensive date, cute and fun works better than expensive and flashy.
-“ Don’t ever say, “What do you want to do?” Girls want to see that you put effort into this date”
-“ I hate not knowing if it’s a first date or not. They ask if you want to hang out, but then you’re left wondering: We did date-like things, but is this a date?
Bottom Line: Be a gentleman. Have a plan. Define that you are actually asking us out.
Meeting Family: I bet his palms are sweating already…
Likes:
-“ If they offer to help with making dinner, and don’t just sit on the couch, they get major brownie points”
-“ Asking about family members and getting to know them, that’s a big thing. Engaging and interacting with them is very important, even if a guy is nervous.”
-“ I like when they fear my father a bit, even though they shouldn’t. If they are still respectful and call him “Sir”, maintain eye contact, and shake his hand, its great!
Dislikes:
-“Look presentable too. Don’t be wearing sweatpants or pajama bottoms.”
– “Don’t ever make comments about my family. You do not talk about them badly, or else you are out the door”
-“ If he isn’t making conversation with my parents and instead is just waiting because he doesn’t know what to say, that’s a bad sign. It’s good if he can talk to anyone in my family, and not rely on me to be a liaison.”
Bottom Line: Look nice, be yourself, and be engaging. My parents will like you because I like you, so don’t be so nervous!
When HIS friends are around: Bros before…excuse me?
Likes:
-“I like when he remembers to include me in the conversation, and ask every so often if I am doing OK. I am fine with enjoying your friends company, but do put a little focus on me”
-“ Being comfortable enough to hold my hand or put his arm around me when his friends are around shows me that he is comfortable with us, and that is great to see!”
Dislikes:
-“ I don’t want to be ignored by all the testosterone in the room”
“ He can’t be afraid to refer to me as his girlfriend.”
Bottom Line: It’s fine to chill with your guys, but just be mindful that we are in the room too. Don’t be too crude and show us some care too.
When YOUR Friends are around:You gotta get with my friends…
Likes:
-“ I like when they try to interact with my girls and ask about themselves. He gets major props if he tries to remember names”
-“ I like when he is comfortable enough to be himself. At the end of the day I’ll be asking my friends what they think of him so he needs to be himself.”
Dislikes:
-“ Don’t get too flirty. Don’t cross the bounds of being social and being flirty. You do not want to be responsible for friends turning against each other”
-“ Don’t judge what I do with my friends. Naturally I will act differently, but he knows me well and shouldn’t judge at face value.
-“ Don’t be cold around them. If he can’t talk to my friends, it’s a bad sign”
Bottom Line: Respect my girls, and engage with them. But don’t cross the line or insult them, or we’re over.
Break Up: It’s hard to do…or so I hear
Likes:
-“ I like when he is sincere about it, and honest. If you know a guy well enough, you will be able to tell when he’s lying”
-“ I like if we are still able to get along down the line. Maybe not right away, but we should still be able to be friends.”
Dislikes:
-“ It has to be face to face. Don’t break up over text, phone, E-mail, Facebook, etc. Have the balls to tell me to my face. It makes me wonder if the relationship even mattered to you at all”
-“ Be honest. Be upfront. Don’t pull the whole “it’s not you, it’s me” card. There’s no reason to lie about anything further. I want to know that I am worth the truth, and worth the effort of the truth.”
Bottom Line: Face to face, or you’re just a coward. Don’t lie either, we can tell.
Well, there you have it. Some of the things that drive us crazy about you, or make us like you even more. The true test for this will be for the men of the world to take this advice, and learn from previous guy’s mistakes. Take full advantage of this insight, and perhaps you now know what to do, or what you messed up on in the past. Trust me, you’ll be surprised at how much girls you know want to talk about this, so ask them!
Photo Credits
Flirting
Hugh Jackman
50 First Dates
Meet the Parents