When someone’s personality shifts depending on whom they’re with, they’re often accused of being fake or molding into other people’s personalities. However, changing how you act a little depending on which friends you’re with is totally OK.
All of your friends are in your life for different reasons. You have high school friends, college friends, and work friends. You have friends you always party with and others you call to check out a quirky art exhibit. You have friends who you go to for advice and friends whose advice you’d never take. There are friends who will always say things to lift you up and others who give you the cold, hard truth when you need it. Of course, these qualities can overlap within friends, but it’s a lot to expect all of these things from one person.
Having a diverse group of friends is great for many reasons. First of all, having friends who aren’t friends with each other lets you take much-needed breaks. All friendships can be overwhelming at times, and it helps to have other people to go to outside of the situation. Also, having friends with a variety of personalities gives you the opportunity to get diverse opinions on a situation.
Each friend serves a different purpose in your life. You met for different reasons and bonded over different things. It makes sense that you aren’t exactly the same with each of them. It’s rare, if not impossible, to find someone who understands you on all levels, so certain aspects of your personality may be more apparent depending on the friend you’re with.
This doesn’t mean that you’re fake or that you don’t have your own personality so you’re taking on theirs. This is only true to a point though. Make sure you really aren’t losing yourself in a friendship or romantic relationship. Check in with yourself and think about whether one aspect of your personality is coming out more or if you’re losing yourself in them. If something feels wrong, then make some changes.
Letting different parts of your personality shine depending on the relationship is perfectly healthy. By recognizing that a friend doesn’t have to connect with you on every level, you open yourself up to meeting people in new places. If you expect a friend to be exactly like you, you may close yourself off to some great friendships. That said, keep your expectations high in regards to how you’re treated because you deserve the best.
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