There are countless articles written about your freshmen year of college covering what to expect and how to deal with it once it’s over. However, what you rarely see are articles about the summer between your freshmen and sophomore year. Let me tell you something: that summer will simultaneously be the best and worst summer of your life. A lot of growing up happens during this transitional time, both mentally and emotionally. For those of you reading this who have already experienced this, or are wondering what it’ll be like, I want to share with you what I’ve learned these past four months and how what I’ve learned has helped me (and hopefully my readers) grow up too. Ladies, it’s time to grow up.
1. Let’s face it: things have changed and so have you.
As much as we want to deny it, we are definitely not the same people we were this time last year. We have a year of independence and adventure under our belts, and with that comes a year of responsibility and growing up. Unfortunately, when you come home that summer right after your freshman year, you’re not fully aware of having grown up. When I arrived home this past summer, I thought I was the same girl I was before I came to college–I was so wrong. Not only had I changed (hopefully for the better), but so had my friends. A lot of us go home that summer and expect old high school friends to be around and to be able to jump back into things just like old times. I’m sorry to tell you, but that is most definitely not the case. Your high school friends are living their respective lives, and guess what? You are too. It’s time to move on and transition into adulthood, my friend; it’s officially time to be an adult.
2. The future is a scary thing.
If I learned anything this past summer, its that the future is absolutely terrifying. No matter how well you’ve planned things out (i.e a five year plan), nothing is certain about the future. Once I realized how uncertain the whole concept of the future was, I felt like a freight train had hit me. I was no longer sure of myself or certain of what I wanted to do with my life. But you know what I learned after three months of dwelling over everything that could possibly go wrong in my life? I learned that, of course, nothing is certain and that is what makes life so beautiful. Yes, bad things can happen, but we, as young women, can’t let the possibility of something bad happening in our day-to-day lives hinder us from growing up and moving forward. It’s okay to be unsure of yourself and the future, but the best way to overcome that uncertainty is to live for today, because tomorrow hasn’t come yet.
3. It’s all a matter of perspective.
No matter what you’re going through right now, I can guarantee you that someone else is going through the exact same thing. This summer, I thought I was the only person who was stressing out about growing up. I thought that I was the only one going through something difficult. But you know what? I wasn’t. Not only was I not alone in stressing out about the future and growing up, but I wasn’t the only person going through a tough time. It’s not hard to feel like you’re the only one going through something–and we’re all guilty of having felt that way. But it’s important to keep in mind that no matter how difficult or hard you think you have it, there are people out there who have it much worse. Keep things in perspective. Learning to put things into perspective is a huge part of growing up because you suddenly realize that the world doesn’t revolve around you. But guess what? If you don’t keep things in perspective, you’re going to dwell on all the negative things in your life. So instead, keep your head up and know that no matter how hard it gets, remember that things can always get better.
4. It’s okay to be sad.
The worst kind of sadness is when you can’t figure out why you’re sad. You can’t pin point the reason you’re sad, or even how you came to be sad. This summer I felt (for lack of a better phrase) “down in the dumps” a lot. What made it worse was that I’ve always been a happy, bubbly person, so I couldn’t figure out why I was sad. In turn, I felt guilty for feeling sad because there was nothing to really be upset about. However, on the last day before I came back to campus, I realized that it’s actually okay to feel sad. Feeling sad or “down in the dumps” is a natural part of life. If we didn’t feel sad, we wouldn’t be human. As young women, we have to understand that even if we can’t necessarily pin point why we’re upset or feel as if we have no reason to be upset, we can’t feel guilty about it. It’s much better to acknowledge our feelings and understand that it’s natural to feel upset, rather than bottling our emotions up and not addressing them when necessary. Feeling sad is a part of life, and acknowledging it is an even greater part of growing up.
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