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The 9 Guys You’ll Meet After College

Posted Jun 18 2014 - 7:00pm

In college, it’s easy to identify the kinds of guys you meet on a daily basis. There’s the frat guy, the bookworm, the sports nut, the partier, the philanthropist, the class clown and countless others all surrounding you wherever you go.

Post-graduation, however, you can’t just identify a guy by which fraternity he’s in or which classes he takes. The dating pool after college is a whole new ball game with completely different kinds of guys and completely different rules. Scary, huh?

So what types of guys should you expect to meet once you leave your university for the real world? This list will help you find out!

1. The Guy Who Can’t Let Go of College

After graduation, there’s always that one guy who just can’t seem to let college go. Once he wakes up and realizes that a Keystone Light with breakfast, lunch and dinner isn’t really acceptable anymore, he might go through a serious phase of denial that leads him to do things like attend his old frat’s weekend parties and continue to hook up with college sophomores on the reg. Even though his university days are behind him, it may seem like he never left college at all (and never will).

The Guy Who Can’t Let Go is living proof that old habits die hard. It’s totally acceptable to beer-bong your coffee in the morning before work, right?

When it comes to the dating game, he’ll probably also be stuck in the college mindset. In his world, taking a girl on a date is too much of a commitment, and long-term, serious relationships are the furthest thing from his mind.

2. The Big-Shot Career Guy

After graduating with a degree in finance/marketing/international business and scoring a job at a major company, The Big-Shot Career Guy has a killer salary and the ego to match. You’ll probably find him during his morning Starbucks run wearing an expensive suit and talking loud on his Blackberry, ignoring the people around him.

Expect him to take you on dates to flashy, expensive restaurants, where he’ll be rude to the waiter and pre-order the wine without asking you if you prefer red or white.

3. The World Traveler

The first few years after college can be a great time for expanding your horizons and engaging in a little self-discovery. Cue the adventurous World Traveler, because you’re bound to meet at least one of them post-graduation.

The World Traveler is that one guy who just got back from backpacking through Europe or taking a road trip across the USA after taking a year off after college to do some exploring. The fact that he doesn’t have a job or a real-life plan won’t seem like that big of a deal because he has so many interesting stories to tell and a huge culture-induced ego.

He’ll probably counter all of your stories with, “Well when I was in Italy…” and correct your pronunciation of  “gyro” whenever you guys go out for Greek food.

4. The Guy on the Rebound

As graduation slowly approached, The Guy on the Rebound had to make a big decision: stay with his long-term college girlfriend, or break things off in return for some personal freedom and a fresh, new start. He chose the latter, and now he’s torn between his desire to hook up with as many new girls as possible and his nagging regret that MAYBE he shouldn’t have broken things off with his ex.

He’s bound to mention his ex at least once when he’s hitting on you at the bar – upwards of five times if he’s had a little too much to drink.

5. The Major Player

While the frat guy with a big ego may no longer have his fraternity to lean on for help picking up chicks, that doesn’t stop him from chatting up every attractive girl he sees at the bar. He has his pick-up lines down to a T and is so charming that you might actually end up falling from his cheesy one-liners and creepy, sporadic winking.

Don’t expect the player from the bar to pull a Jacob from Crazy, Stupid, Love and fall madly in love with you, though. In reality, he’ll probably never call you back, and then you’ll find out that he’s dating your coworker Rachel (AND your other coworker Natalie).

6. The Guy Who Lives With His Parents

While The Guy Who Lives With His Parents is really just being practical, he’s probably not the kind of guy you want to date after graduation – the biggest reason being that hooking up in the room next to his parents’ master bedroom is so weirdly a throwback to high school. (And you thought squishing two people onto that tiny dorm bed of yours was bad…)

Fair warning: Going back to his place for a nightcap will probably involve an awkward 20-minute convo with his mom that involves browsing through all of his old baby pictures.

7. The Hipster

After graduating with a degree in art history/social justice/environmental studies, you’ll find this tortured soul haunting every Starbucks on your route to work. He’s sensitive, he’s deep, he just got back from his time with the Peace Corps and he has a ponytail that gives yours a run for its money.

You’ll probably date him until you realize that his skinny jeans are skinnier than yours and you decide that if you have to go to one more vegan restaurant, you’ll completely lose it. That’s when you know it’s time to switch back from herbal tea to Diet Coke and move on with your life.

8. The Guy Who Has No Idea What He’s Doing With His Life

This guy has absolutely no clue where he’s going with his life. He changed his major at least five times when he was in school. Now, he has a job at Target to pass the time while he decides if he really wants to put his psychology degree to use or if he should just stall a little bit by going to graduate school.

This guy has a lot of hypothetical plans for the future, like, “Maybe I’ll go to law school,” or, “I’ll probably just work at Starbucks for a few years and get my master’s,” or, “I should totally get a bartending license,” but none of these plans ever seem to pan out. Expect the same for his dating game: He’s definitely the guy who will bail last-minute and leave you dateless to your friend’s big New Year’s party. Skip it.

9. The Older Guy

When you’re in college, a freshman dating a senior isn’t exactly unheard of, but it’s definitely not the norm. After graduation, however, a four-year age gap isn’t really that big of a deal. That means the hot guy from work who sits a few cubicles down from you is totally fair game, even if he does have more than a year or two on you.

Instead of a morning trek to the dining hall, he’ll take you to fancy brunches. Forget about walk-of-shaming past his roommate in the morning, because he has his own apartment. Sounds like a pretty sweet deal, right?

Beware, though, because dating The Older Guy can make you feel a little bit like a child. He might lecture you about responsibility when you *accidentally* blow your entire monthly paycheck on new shoes and Chinese takeout, and there’s a good chance that you’ll feel totally out of place when you go to dinner with all his sophisticated thirtysomething friends.

Even though the dating pool is a little more limited than your college days, don’t let that get you down. Yes, you’re bound to date some weirdos, and you’ll definitely have a terrible first date or two, but eventually you’ll find that guy who’s right for you.

Until then, bask in the glory that is adulthood – date the hipster from the coffee shop. At least you’ll get a lot of free Starbucks out of it.

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