We’ve all been a part of moments we’d rather not remember, and that’s especially true when it comes to awkward hook-up situations. What can be worse than accidentally calling the cute guy kissing your neck by your ex’s name? Or having your roommate unexpectedly come home early and walk in on you and your guy? Here at HC, we’re committed to making sure you are prepared for anything collegiette life throws your way. So we’ve solved your most awkward moments – keep reading for the scoop!
So Awk: You Call Your Hook-up By the Wrong Name
“I had hooked up with this really attractive guy a few times, and it was always amazing,” says Kristen, a student at Pomona College. “We were right in the middle of things, and I accidentally called him by one of my guy friends’ names! It was mortifying to say the least, and he didn’t call me again after that.” If this has ever happened to you, then you know how horrible the situation can be. You’re embarrassed, he’s turned off, and you’re not sure how to move on from it. And whether you called him by a friend’s name, your ex’s, or a name you don’t even recognize (hey, it happens!), you want to fix the situation as soon as possible. Here’s how:
- Try Humor: Laugh it off, explaining how surprised you are that you said that, especially since all you can think about lately is him…
- Apologize: If he’s upset or hurt, then say you’re sorry. It was an honest mistake and it has nothing to do with how much you’re enjoying yourself with him. Let him know that and don’t bring it up ever again.
- If all else fails, pretend it didn’t happen. He’s not going to stop mid-hook-up and if he does, just look confused and pull him back toward you.
So Awk: You’d Like to Take Things to the Next Step, But You Are On Your Period (And Don’t Want to Tell Him)
This has happened to the best of us, and it’s never fun, especially since it means you have to refrain from taking things to the next level. “I started hooking up with a guy, and I really liked him so we started talking about having sex,” says Rachel, a student at the University of Missouri. “When the time came, though, I had my period! I didn’t know what to do so I super awkwardly cut things short. I’m sure he thought I just wasn’t into it.” One way to handle this situation is to make an excuse. He doesn’t need to know the details of your period woes, and you don’t have to explain yourself. All you need to do is explain that you aren’t feeling well, aren’t ready yet, are too tired, are too drunk and want to be able to remember/enjoy it, etc. There are plenty of excuses that he will appreciate and will make you feel better about having sex with him once you can.
Another way to handle this awkward moment? Be upfront with him! Guys understand that girls have periods, and sometimes honesty is a much better route to take. If you don’t play it right, an excuse might seem like you just don’t want to hook up with him. Instead, just say, “Sorry, it’s my time of the month.” He won’t press you any further, and he’ll probably try again a week later when he figures it’s over!
So Awk: You Want to Use Protection, But You Are Nervous to Bring It Up
Even though we all know to use protection when hooking up with someone, it’s not always the easiest topic to bring up with your guy. It can be awkward and uncomfortable, and it puts a pause on the hook-up for a few minutes—but it’s uber important. “It was my first time hooking up with this guy, and I think he assumed I was on birth control, but I’m not,” says Ally, a student at the University of Illinois. “I felt really weird about asking him to use protection, but finally I worked up the courage and just asked.” There really aren’t a lot of ways to approach this situation without outright asking him to use protection, but there are ways to make it less awkward. The key is to ask before your clothes are off, otherwise you may be too into it to remember to ask. Your best bet is to say, “Do you have a condom?” This shows that you want to have sex which he’ll probably be happy about – plus, he’s not looking to get you pregnant (or get an STD) either! Don’t skirt around it, just be upfront about needing to use something and don’t make it an issue – get back to what you were doing just as soon as the situation is handled – don’t apologize or ask to pay him for it because trust us, he’d rather just get back to the hook-up. And remember that you should never be having sex without using protection, regardless of any awkwardness.
So Awk: One of You (Or Both) is Really Drunk, and the Hook-up Is Super Sloppy
Let’s be real here: a lot of college hook-ups start with alcohol, and that’s okay so long as you are both sober enough to consent to the hook-up and being safe. But even when both of those things are true, drunken hook-ups aren’t always that fun. “I hooked up with this guy, and he was really drunk,” says Lauren, a student at Boston University. “It was really gross, and I just was not enjoying myself at all.” If this happens to you, and you want to end the hook-up, then say: “I had a ton of fun with you tonight, but I’m really drunk and would rather hook-up again another night. Call me?” However, if you still want to hook up that night, just not when it’s so sloppy, then take a break for a little while. Tell him you need to eat something or have to go call your friend and make sure she got home safely. Buy yourself some time! But remember, if you’re planning to leave while you’re still drunk; make sure to find a way to get home safely. Ask him to walk you home or have a friend pick you up from wherever you are.
So Awk: One of Your Roommates Comes Home and Walks In On The Two of You
So you think you have the place to yourself, and you’re enjoying a fun hook-up with a cute guy. Then suddenly you hear footsteps and your roommate calling for you. Before you can even react, she’s walking into your room. Yikes, right? While this is surely an awkward situation for you, it’s probably even more uncomfortable for your guy – he doesn’t even know her and can’t laugh about it later. The best thing to do is to cover up both of you as much as you can, politely ask her to leave (if she hasn’t already), and then apologize to the guy. If it didn’t kill the mood, then you can figure out another place to go or you can ask your roommate to leave. But if it did, then try to laugh about it (make a joke like, “Well, that was awkward!”) and see if he wants to watch a movie, grab some food, etc. and take a rain check on your hook-up. Don’t make it into too big of a deal because that will just make your guy feel worse. Laugh about it and move on!
So Awk: You Blurt Out You Love Him
In the heat of the moment, it’s possible to say almost anything and not even realize what’s coming out of your mouth until it’s too late. “I had literally met this guy that same night, and we went back to his house to hook up,” says Briana, a student at the University of Colorado-Boulder. “All of a sudden, in the middle of the hook-up, I told him I loved him! I have no idea why, and I honestly wanted to die.” Okay sure, telling a guy you love him in the middle of hooking up is definitely awkward, but there are ways to salvage the night. First things first, do not address what you said right after you said it – finish your hook-up before you talk about it. Then, feed his ego a bit to take away from the seriousness of your comment by saying something like, “Wow. I can’t believe I was so into our hook-up that I told you I loved you!” Then laugh at how ridiculous it is that you could love him already (even if you actually do – who knows!). And if he seems really freaked out by it, then just say, “Hey, just so we’re clear, everything I say in the heat of the moment is exaggerated…” then smile. He’ll understand.
Awkward moments are just a part of hooking up and if you don’t feel ready to handle them, then there’s no shame in waiting until you are. And while it may seem like the end of the world when any of these things happen to you, you can rest easy knowing that your hook-up buddy doesn’t care. In fact, he’s probably more worried about what you’re thinking of him and if you’re going to let him continue to make out with you. Plus, if he can’t handle a little awkwardness without being a jerk, then he probably isn’t someone you want to be hooking up with! All you can really do is act like the confident collegiette you are – own the moment, and it’ll soon become just a faded memory (or at least one to laugh about at brunch).