Every girl embraces her inner badass and does some naughty things now and then — like refilling your Slurpee before checkout, masterfully rearranging the pillows on the couch after your little coffee spill, or “forgetting” to return your roomie’s super cute shirt until she actually asks about it.
Then there are the times when you’re feeling really badass and want to do some really naughty things. Things that are so naughty you vow not to tell anyone except your diary and your dog. Things such as having sex in public, keeping a hook-up list, or taking pictures (sans clothing) for your special someone.
So how do you do naughty things the nice girl way (without getting kicked out of school, having your face and naughty bits plastered all over the internet, or ending up in jail)? With stories from the brave collegiettes™ who’ve attempted the following naughty acts and juicy tips from sex therapist Dr. Karen Stewart, Her Campus has the goods to tell you how to be bad (but not too bad).
Have Sex in Public
You’ve seen it in the movies. You’ve heard rumors of the spot to do it on campus. What are you waiting for? “It is normal for every couple to want to spice things up in their relationship, and many think, what better way than to do it in a different place!” says Dr. Stewart.
“While experimenting with having sex in public can be exhilarating, daring and more interesting, it is important to think of the consequences. Getting arrested for public nudity or indecent exposure is a true mood killer,” she warns.
Every collegiette could use a little spice in her relationship, but penalties for getting caught in the act can range from a warning to a small fine to probation. Spontaneous as you’d like it to be, having sex in public requires a bit of preparation. But trust us. A little planning won’t take away from any of the excitement.
Approach the subject with your guy, and decide on the time and place you’d like to do the deed. Keep in mind the amount of traffic the area gets and during what times of the day. Complete seclusion isn’t necessary (the possibility of getting caught is part of what makes this so hot—you just don’t want to actually get caught,) but peak study hour at the library during finals is probably not the best decision.
Once it’s go time, wear the skirt or dress that drives your boyfriend wild with nothing underneath. He’ll get worked up in seconds, making this encounter a quick one, lessening the chance of getting caught. Make sure one of you brings a condom, and go for a standing-up position (like from behind) so you can break things up quickly if you hear anyone approaching. Don’t expect the sex to be great or even good, because there won’t be much or any foreplay and it will be rushed, and neither of you can make any noise—attempting this is just about the thrill of the experience, if you dare.
Oops, I Did It Again: “Spring Break, freshman year, my boyfriend and I snuck out of the beach house we were staying in with friends and headed to the beach. It was after midnight so you could barely see anything, but we stayed near the dunes, laid out a towel to keep sand away from our exposed areas, and we had sex.” –Mia*
Make a Sex Tape
Just because this didn’t go so well for Paris and Kim doesn’t mean it will be a disaster for everyone. Being extremely cautious could prevent dreadful results. “After counseling many women about their feelings after their boyfriends exposed their sex tapes, I can firmly say don’t do it unless you keep the only copies,” Dr. Stewart advises.
A tarnished reputation and utter public humiliation are not on a nice girl’s bucket list. Just think: Grandma would never look at you the same, your boss wouldn’t think twice about snatching that job out from under your feet, and some potential boyfriends could be scared off by your indiscretion.
Even if your boyfriend is the one to suggest doing this, take control of the situation. And, ladies, he should be a trusted figure in your life for quite some time before ever agreeing to film yourselves getting it on. Without getting too in depth (sex should be passionate not technical), discuss the basic guidelines of this cinematic feat: length of the filming, positioning of the camera, sound or no sound, etc.
When details have been arranged, set up your own camera or laptop, and get taping. Watch the tape together for reasons previously agreed upon — foreplay, critique, pure interest — and then get rid of it—immediately. There’s no sense in hanging on to a ticking time bomb like a sex tape, when you can simply make another one should the urge ever arise again.
If you sense any hesitation or suspicious behavior on his part because of your requests to be in charge, speak up and clear the air, and/or halt all plans before going forth. While the choice of making a sex tape needs to be a joint one, the repercussions often fall solely on the female.
Oops, I Did It Again: “My guy was a film major, so obviously this came up. We made one using my camera, and then we watched it together. It was pretty hot! I’d never want that kind of footage lying around, though, so we made sure to delete it immediately after we watched it.” –Kendall*
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Keep a Hook-Up List
The Duke F**k List may have gone a tad further than necessary, but there’s nothing wrong with taking a trip down your own romantic memory lane. Dr. Stewart agrees, seeing no harm in maintaining a list of the guys you’ve had a fun time with.
But, if the list is released, you’ll be dragging plenty of people down with you. “Keep it in the most private of places,” Dr. Stewart says. “Feelings are bound to be hurt if it gets in the wrong hands,” she adds.
As Dr. Stewart mentioned, the list should be kept far away from nosy people and prying eyes. Save the file on your computer, under a completely unrelated name, that is not accessible from your desktop.
If you go the old-school route of taking pen to paper, write in code. It will add some fun to your list-making while maintaining a level of discreetness. Explicitly stating every single detail is just asking for trouble, whereas a nickname with five dots next to it will take a bit more guesswork to decipher. When you’re done writing about your romantic encounters, hide the list in a private place in your room. Under your mattress is an obvious hiding spot, so get creative! And don’t label it “Hook-Up List”… duh!
Oops, I Did It Again: “I started doing this sophomore year of high school! I did it to keep track and share with my girlfriends. It’s pretty funny, actually. There’s a scale of stars from one to four to denote the amount of stuff I did with the guy. Then, I wrote cute little anecdotes on the side to remember the guy. Not that the list is miles long, trust me.” –Danielle*
Have Phone or Skype Sex
It’s like they invented technology just for long-distance lovers. “Phone sex and Skype sex can be a great way to stay connected with a partner and to allow yourself to be more comfortable talking dirty,” Dr. Stewart says.
Be entirely certain that your roomie or parents are not home when the cybersex takes place. The phone and Skype “allow you to say things and fantasies that you may not have been comfortable expressing in person,” Dr. Stewart adds, but worrying about someone overhearing your wild ways could be totally inhibiting.
Your boyfriend should have a private place to chat and let loose, as well. While he may have no problem with his roommate lurking in the corner of their room doing homework, you undoubtedly will.
Remember, it might take a little longer to warm up to each other over a piece of technology, but once you start, it will be hard to stop. Carve out at least an hour of your time, and say just the right things that you know get your guy going — fast.
Skype is great at making you feel as though you are together, in person, but having your guy intensely watch you touch yourself or make your “O face” could feel embarrassing at first. Try phone sex a few times until you achieve a level of comfort, and then move on to Skype.
Oops, I Did It Again: “My guy watched me take a shower over Skype. It felt naughty but also exciting!” –Meg*
Take Naughty Pictures
We’re certainly not advocating an extravagant photo shoot. Homemade nude-y calendars can be a bit tacky, no? A sultry snapshot or two couldn’t hurt to liven things up, though. “It can be fun and sexy to send your man a sassy picture of yourself, but, unfortunately, even in the best of intentions, these materials can end up in the wrong hands,” says Dr. Stewart.
Vanessa Hudgens, anyone? We’re guessing you don’t want to travel down the long, embarrassing road she did. Much like the release of a sex tape, if your naked pictures get in to the hands of someone other than the intended person, your education, career and reputation will be in danger.
Gossip spreads quickly around a college campus. Your sorority could kick you out, your scholarship could be revoked, and you could even be expelled from your university.
If a naughty photo or two is the way you want to please your man, though, we suggest not going completely nude in your pictures. Put on some sexy lingerie, or, if you really want to be naked, cover up those places with your hands, clothing or random objects. Sure, it might sound silly, but not giving all of yourself away can be just as sexy as going full-on nude. And, if the pictures were to get out to someone besides your boyfriend, it may be a little less humiliating for you than if you were completely naked.
When you go to take your pictures, find a comfortable, private (the door must be locked!) place to do it in. Make sure all of the details of your “set” (light, temperature, etc.) are to your liking. You are most likely going to be nervous, so you want to be as comfortable and relaxed as possible. Get creative, too! Practice with different poses, facial expressions and camera angles. Look at magazines for position ideas, but don’t go too over the top—you want these photos to be sexy, not funny. Then, snap a photo or two, and be done with it.
Trust and responsibility are key when taking and giving nude pictures. Only give the photos to a guy with whom you’ve been in a long-term relationship and who has the utmost respect for you. Talk to him about how he can keep your pictures private. And, though texting or emailing a photo might be the quicker option, your picture could easily be sent to the wrong person, or worse — your entire address book — so be careful. Once you’ve given or sent the pictures to your special someone, delete them immediately. You never know who could get access to your camera or phone—and what they would do once they found the pictures.
Oops, I Did It Again: “I am guilty of taking naughty pictures for my guy. I can’t help wanting to please my guy even when I’m not there; it’s an addicting feeling knowing that you can turn him on when you’re not even around.” –Valerie*
Sources
*All names have been changed
Real college girls
Dr. Karen Stewart
http://www.wikihow.com/Take-