12 Signs You Liked Ladies Before You Knew You Did

Let’s get real for a second, okay? As uncertain as you were about liking ladies before you really figured it out, there were quite a few obvious signs you somehow missed. These are 12 moments you can look back on with a smile and think, "Wow, how did I not see that?"

1. You watched way too much The L Word, South of Nowhere or Faking It

Depending on what age you realized, you probably had an obsession with an LGBTQ-centric show for “no reason” for several years before understanding caught up to you. Oh, that’s why every word Amy Raudenfeldsays sounds like my brain? I get it now.

Related: 9 College Women Get Real About Coming Out

2. You related to Emily the most out of all the Liars

And not just because she’s smart and a great swimmer. Let’s face it, you could probably relate to her lady troubles, between the forbidden feelings for Ali and all that drama with Paige and Maya. All the other Liarsessentially stick to one main guy throughout the series, but Emily had a series of cute ladies lining up to date her. You probably wished that were your life, too.

3. You wanted female characters to get together

Whether it was Beca and Chloe’s obvious chemistry in Pitch Perfect or the high hopes that Karma will realize she’s bisexual and go for Amy in Faking It, you were crossing your fingers for lady romances long before you knew you wanted one yourself. And every time a female character thought, “Maybe I like women,” you wondered why it sounded so familiar.

4. You were always really supportive and open to same-sex relationships

Even before you knew you were open to same-sex relationships in your own life, you were extra supportive of the struggles faced by the LGBTQ+ community. If you had friends in same-sex relationships, you thought it was adorable and were their biggest cheerleader.

5. You had a sixth sense about other ladies’ sexuality

You totally knew your best friend was gay before she told you, and you even had several celebrities’ sexualities pinned down before they came out in public. Maybe it’s a superpower, or maybe it’s just that you were really perceptive because you were still figuring out your own feelings.

6. You were obsessed with Ruby Rose on Orange is the New Black

Okay, to be fair, a lot of straight women can agree on this. But you knew, deep down, that your “girl crush” on Ruby Rose was actually just, well, a crush. You meant it in a way that straight women didn’t, it just took you a little while to realize it.

7. You kept adding more and more women to your girl crush list

Haven’t we all made a list at some point of our top ten celebrity crushes? You found that you were adding more and more “girl crushes” to your hot list, and your overall list of girl crushes was growing longer by the day. And that these girl crushes weren’t as innocent as you were making them seem.

8. You said you were an ally, but seemed more like a part of the community

The community has known you as a supportive ally for a while, but you took that pride pin literally everywhere you went. Or maybe you went to gay and lesbian night at the bar every time it happened for six months, because you couldn't miss it. Whatever it was, there was at least one sign that you were more personally involved in the LGBTQ+ community than you gave yourself credit for.

9. You thought a few times about hooking up with another girl

This goes double if you were drinking at all that night, because we all know our true selves tend to come out when we’re letting our guard down. If you had more than a few “what if” moments with a lady friend, you were probably silly to think you could hide the truth from yourself for much longer.

10. You had your first real crush on a lady

Whether she was a close friend or a beautiful woman you met at a bar, you finally had your first real crush on a lady. You couldn’t chalk it up to a “girl crush,” this time. She had you.

11. You related too easily to a song about lady love


Whether it was something by t.A.T.u., Teagan and Sarah, Ani DiFranco or just Demi Lovato’s “Cool for the Summer,” there was at least one standout song that pinpointed how you actually felt about ladies. It was difficult to ignore.

12. You were kind of obsessed with a queer female celebrity


Whether it was Kristen Stewart, Cara Delevingne or Ellen Page, you totally had the hots for—I mean, a healthy obsession with—at least one queer celebrity before you came out. She was probably just your role model, and you knew that someday, you’d be able to tell the world how beautiful she was, and be your true self.

It happens to all of us at some point: we look back and realize we missed quite a few signs that now seem glaringly obvious. At least now you can think about how clueless you were and laugh. And watch the entire Harry Potter series on repeat—staring at Hermione the entire time.