If you’ve been on the Internet recently, “Stranger Things 2” has probably been on your radar at one point or another. From the “Dad Steve memes” to Eleven’s makeover, the hit Netflix original series has become an instant classic with a loyal and devoted fanbase. However, not everything is incredibly peachy keen in the Stranger Things fan community. Recently, 27-year-old model Ali Michael asked 14-year-old “Stranger Things” actor, Finn Wolfhard via Instagram to “hit her up in four years.”
If you just felt your stomach curdle, congratulations, you’re a decent f*cking human being. Wolfhard has since responded to Michael’s comment, calling the entire thing “weird” and “gross.” The Texas model has since apologized for her actions, saying they were inappropriate, as the rightfully were.
Luckily, there was lots of backlash towards Michael and her comments toward the underage Canadian actor. However, many people via Twitter, are confused by Wolfhard’s response.
However, there are so many people, both men and women alike, insisting that the underage boy “accept the compliment.”
The UNDERAGE boy should accept the proposition from the grown woman nearly twice his age. Seriously?!
The Wolfhard-Michael controversy highlights a problem that has plagued not only Hollywood but society as whole.
Don’t get me wrong, the hypersexualization of children, especially child stars, is a problem that knows no gender.
Mara Wilson, well known for her eponymous role as Matilda in the 1996 film “Matilda,” spoke about her own experience in defense of 13-year-old “Stranger Things” star Millie Bobby Brown.
“It does not feel good to have strange men comment on your body when you are 13, whether in a ‘positive’ or ‘negative’ way,” said Wilson. “You are repeatedly told that you dress too old or you dress too young.”
But when it comes to way that society sexualizes male child actors, or male children in general, is of a different breed. A lot of it comes from…wait for it….
Toxic Masculinity.
Toxic Masculinity is a rigid system that pigeonholes men into a strict definition of what it means to be a man. Not to be confused with masculinity within itself. There’s nothing wrong with being masculine. Being a beef jerky eating, weight-lifting picture perfect definition of masculinity is fine, you do you boo-boo.
HOWEVER the problem arises when we, as a society, expect every man, boy or person who identifies as male to fulfill this unattainable standard. A person’s manhood should not reside in an arbitrary set of traits.
But what does this have to do with the cast of “Stranger Things”?
Ryan Douglass, writer and contributor to the Huffington Post, describes the two fundamentals of toxic masculinity in his article: violence and sexual conquest. Douglass goes on to describe how men are often raised to see their sex lives being directly correlating with their own masculinity. This viewpoint bleeds into the way that we raise boys to see themselves and others.
We see this all the time in media as well. The Adam Sandler movie “That’s My Boy” involves the premise of a 14-year-old boy who impregnates his middle school teacher. No, this isn’t a psychological exploration of the pedophile mind.
It’s a “comedy.”
Middle school statutory. Ha ha. So funny.
In the movie, the boy is hailed as a “stud” for conquering his teacher while the woman is arrested and shamed (as she rightfully should be).
My point is that society views that the harassment of young boys via older women is justifiable due to the fact “men like sex.” Men are taught that we’re supposed to want sex all the time and are shunned if they don’t. We pass this message from generation to generation.
To reiterate to those who don’t seem to get it, children, male, female and all in between, cannot and should not consent to sexual activity with an adult. Nor should they be pressured into feeling “flattered by the attention.”
To the people who crow that Finn Wolfhard as “lucky,” no one deserves to be harassed. Because an adult sexually propositioning a kid is harassment. Not a compliment. Not a joke. Harassment.
Children, particularly child actors, are thrust into the adult world far too quickly. Let us be the generation that allows them to hold on to their childhoods for as long as they can.