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Local Student Gets Caught in a Pyramid Scheme

Transfer student Kayla Winters has been reported as the newest target for local independent sales consultants. Since last week, several people have asked her out to coffee and house parties.

“I’ve been trying to meet new people on campus, and I guess I’m getting really popular because a lot of people are following me on social media now. I’ve even been invited to four parties.”

Earlier this morning, Kayla received an interesting message from one of her new friends. “She said I had such a cool vibe, and thought I would be perfect to model some of her leggings! I’m even going to get an amazing deal on the ones I want!”

At press time, Kayla’s lab partner Naomi disclosed that she saw Kayla purchase a starter kit online. Two hours later she received an email from Kayla about joining her down line. It was quickly deleted.

DISCLAIMER: Satire

Stephanie Zengler is a Business Administration major and Communication Studies minor, and she completely understands if you think her last name is actually Ziegler. Like a lot of business majors, Stephanie has a favorite Andrew Carnegie quote, and like a good communication minor, has very strong opinions on the Oxford comma. Aside from being a Stout student, Stephanie is an avid fan of Bay Area sports, Fleetwood Mac, and the amazingly perfect show Dollface.
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