Being a STEM Major When You’re Not Good at Science

Ever since I could remember, I sucked at science. I was never good at it. If you asked me to do a chemistry problem, I would probably cry and throw a fit. It would take me four hours to do problems that would take others thirty minutes to do.

Image result for hate science gifYou’d think that because of this I would try to avoid science subjects like the plague, right? That’s what any sane person would do. But instead, I decided to dedicate the rest of my life to the science field, and not just any science field but pre-med to be exact. The field that (I know from experience) is filled with chemistry, biology, organic chemistry, etc.

Now why did I choose this field? Trust me, girl, I ask myself that question every time I am faced with a chem midterm, but when it comes down to it, it's just one easy answer and it’s… I cannot see myself doing anything else. I love medicine and I like science ─ when I understand it ─ but it's that path to understanding it that makes me want to actually die. To this day, I have to work twice as hard as the pre-med kid next to me because science isn’t easy for me ─ it's like learning a different language.

High School Ugh GIF by Film Society of Lincoln CenterNow being a STEM major, I’ve definitely gotten weird looks when I have said this to other STEM people because their immediate thought is “then why are you here?” and to be honest, sometimes I ask myself that question too. When I get a midterm back and I see myself getting half the grade the person next to me gets, and they only studied five hours whereas I studied the whole night and haven’t slept in 2 days, it can be disheartening. Sometimes it is really not fair. But when I do feel like this, there is one thought that gets me through it and reminds me that it’s worth it.

The end goal is to become a doctor and help people, and that is worth more than anything in the world because if I can save someone’s mom, that makes it all worth it ─ because I remember the doctor who saved my mom and every day I’m thankful. So even though science classes may take a part of my soul away every time I take them, in the end, it will all be worth it.