Falling In Love After Falling Out Of It

Image Source: Pinterest

In April of 2016, I wrote an article that got over 300 shares on Facebook about the relationship I was in. The title, "Why Being in a Relationship in College is Possible," accompanied by a picture of me kissing the cheek of the guy I was in love with, was popping up on people's news feeds from near and far.

A girl who I had went to high school with, who went to college in a different state, texted me saying even her roommate had shared the article. I was amazed at the positive reactions I was getting on the ideas and opinions I had in the article, and also on my relationship in general. I was on cloud 9.

By October 2016, things were looking a lot different. My relationship status had changed, and I felt immense regret for going so public, and publishing an article about the guy I had been with.

The article was out there for good. Although I wanted to, there was nothing I could do to remove it from cyberspace. I couldn't cover it up or pretend like it didn't happen - it was going to be there forever.

Turns out, the story of this article taught me a lesson about relationships that I will treasure for the rest of my life. That is, you can't take back love - erase it if you will - and you can't negate feelings you once had. I came to accept this lesson after months of trying to date again.

Image Source: Pinterest

Working to fall back in love after falling out of it was hard. With every new person I met, I refused to tell them about the person who I had spent the last two years with.

It's true, these new people could have easily Google'd my name and read all about it, but that was something they would have to do on their own time. I told myself that I wasn't going to waste my time talking about something that no longer was, no matter how much I invested in them.

Overall, I wanted the relationship, just like the article, deleted from my life completely.

My inability to come to terms with my past affected my future. I didn't think I needed to address my past to move on, but I really did. Ignoring and 'deleting' a part of your life does no good for your future. Not accepting that I did, once, have feelings for this person was contributing to walls that I put up for the people I was now meeting.

Instead of doing what I was doing, I needed to accept what once was, and allow it to be a part of the story of who I am now.

Image Source: Pinimg

In order to have a prosperous future, you must be honest with yourself and the people around you, and you must accept yourself and your past. Never try to be someone you are not, or be afraid to share apart of your past. Covering up and ignoring things just means you're lying to yourself - and you should never do that.