Spooky season just ended, but pregnancy scares are forever. There’s the pill, the shot, the ring, and even a plain ole’ condom; but WTF is an IUD? An IUD stands for Intrauterine Device, so yes, it goes inside your… uterus. Very invasive, I know, but totally worth it!
Let’s start from the beginning. So my journey with birth control started around my first year in university. I started doing the deed on the regular, which resulted in me having to get tested on the regular, which resulted in me and my girl, Stephanie, being very well-aquainted with each other (Stephanie is the head nurse at my local sex health clinic). Everytime I would pay her a visit, she would gently lecture me about my lack of contraception use. Finally, Stephanie won. She got through to my thick skull and I booked myself a consultation with the doctor at the clinic to discuss options.
My lovely doctor told me that the IUD is the most effective and low maintenance method. I heard “low maintenance” and my legs were spread open for her to insert this yeetus fetus in me right away. However, it wasn’t so simple. I needed to pick up the prescription for the IUD from a pharmacy, book the procedure date, and I even had to shove a pill (also prescribed, as it’s supposed to help with the pain) into my cooch and let that dissolve 15 minutes before my procedure.
I am a rather “do it now, so you won’t have to worry about it later” type of person (sadly, not school-wise though) and so my relationship with birth control was kind of like diving straight into the deep-end. I went from never touching a condom (don’t tell, Stephanie) to having a little T-shaped apparatus inserted directly into my oven.
The procedure itself was quite the experience. There’s a lot of swapping, a device called the speculum (google image it), and pain. I have an average pain tolerance and it was maybe a seven out of ten. The aftermath, however, is more painful than the actual insertion. It was like period cramps ten fold. Good news is- pain is temporary, but babies are permanent. So when you look at it that way, hellfire cramps aren’t so bad. All jokes aside, if you’re thinking of getting an IUD yourself and are afraid of the pain, don’t be. It was all tolerable and I never had a moment where I felt like I couldn’t do it anymore.
Lastly, please get tested regularly (for STIs and babies). I want all of us to be on first-name bases with our sex clinic nurses.