Insecurities are one of the most common yet dreadful things one can experience, and they can turn a perfectly confident person into someone who is constantly looking for things to hate about themselves. Insecurities do not come naturally; in my opinion, they only come when you allow them to, for example, comparing yourself to others daily.
We can never be completely happy or satisfied with the way we look, work or dress because we all have this “perfect” image of what we are supposed to look like in our minds; an embodiment of someone else other than ourselves.
As an insecure kid my entire life, one thing I eventually came to terms with is if you let yourself think that others are better than you, you are the one at fault. It is never about whether the other person is more successful, it is about giving your best efforts in anything you do and pursue.
Another thing I learned is that everyone is unique with their own special talents. If someone is good at cooking, then maybe you are good at something else.
Imagine you have always been amazing at basketball; you were always proud of yourself and knew you could beat anyone. Suddenly, you come across a player who is just as good, with a different technique of playing; you feel like this person is your competition. Will that stop you from being your best? Will that turn you away from loving basketball? No, right? You will still be as good as you were before and maybe even get better. But if you let that other person get to you and make your mind your enemy, you will never be able to reach your full potential.
Insecurities can be hard to let go of, I learned that the hard way. I used to compare myself to friends and strangers all the time. I felt like, while some people could effortlessly fit in without compromising who they are, I was always trying too hard to fit in because I was scared of being myself. I always lost in the end.
I soon realized that it is not me who is hard to get along with. If people want to get to genuinely know me, they will make the effort to––otherwise, they are not worth my time. This is where your mindset should be.
Stop comparing––Just stop. Stop falling into the rabbit hole of trying to please others.
The goal is to love yourself for who you are, not how you want other people to see you.