Flirtation vs. Seduction

It’s Valentine’s Day! You’re probably trying to attract someone on this special day, but don’t know whether to flirt or seduce. Flirtation and seduction are two types of charms that can attract the opposite or same sexes. Some people may think both are the same. However, they are very different from each other. These are the differences of flirtation and seduction and how you can try to attract the opposite or same sexes! 

What is Flirtation?

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As the Oxford Dictionary defines flirtation, “Behaviour that demonstrates a playful sexual attraction to someone.” Basically, flirtation is a very light way of teasing with charm. This type of charm can always come off as a compliment, pick-up lines or even flirting passively with someone you’re attracted to.

It’s pretty easy to flirt! You can’t be too shy about flirting. If you’re too shy about flirting, then it will be noticeable to the person you are trying to attract. Most of the time, it is not hard approaching someone and starting a small conversation with them.

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However, somehow accidentally (or purposely) making someone feel uncomfortable is NOT flirting. It’s not only creepy but making someone feel uncomfortable by using cat-calling comments, whistling noises or sexual jokes counts as sexual harassment. According to the statistics on Barna, about 77 percent of men and women have been sexually harassed verbally. If anything, you can do better than that! Most people are not going to spark up a conversation with someone who just cat-called them!

Try using these types of flirting methods:

  • Compliments: “Hey, baby! Your cologne smells amazing today.” or “I love how the way your eyes look at me, it’s so beautiful.” or “I think you’re just a naturally stunning person that you make everything look flawless.”

  • Pick-up Lines (Avoid using the cliche pick-up lines; these pick-up lines are fun if you want to come off as comical or humorous to the person you’re trying to attract): “Do you have 11 protons? Because you’re sodium fine ;).” or “Dessert before dinner?”

  • Passive Flirting: Batting your eyes, actively listening and paying attention, hands in your hair from time to time, having confidence and a great personality! DON’T FORGET TO SMILE as well.

What is Seduction?

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As the Oxford Dictionary defines seduction, “The action of seducing someone.” This means enticing someone in ways that can lead to sexual activities. Flirting may be easier for most people, but seduction is another level of attracting someone. People can have natural seduction by the way they look, while others have to perform the seduction to the person they’re attracting.

When it comes to being seductive, it has to be very intimate and classy in a sexual way. Seducing someone is supposed to be sexy, tempting and enticing someone in a very slow manner. You can either use words or your body language to seduce someone. It brings desire to the end goal.

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However, don’t try to ask for ANY sexual activity directly to a person you just met; that is nowhere near seduction. There is nothing wrong with hooking up with someone you’re attracted to, but you don’t want to look desperate. In addition, make sure you are completely comfortable with this person you are trying to seduce. Since seduction CAN lead to sexual activities, you and your partner must ALWAYS have consent with each other and of course, be safe.

  • Seducing with words (Words can be seductive, it can bring temptation): Something’s simple as: “I really want you.” or “come with me and let’s get out of here; anywhere where there’s only me and you.” or “stay with me; you know you don’t want to leave."  These words are better than texting, “you up?” or “what would you do if I was there alone with you? ;)”   

  • Seducing with body language (The body is made for seducing, but use it with class and respect): Give him/her the “bedroom eyes”, bite your lips slightly, come closer to that person like you’re going to kiss him/her, place your hands in his/her hair combing through it softly and lightly touch him/her where he/she would want to be touched…   

Though the two words are different, it all comes down to having confidence and determination to attract someone. Always stay safe and of course, let the person you’re flirting or seducing be comfortable. Good Luck and have a Happy Valentine’s Day!