Dear Reader,
Many individuals feel lonely during the holiday season. They feel emotionally isolated from everyone else’s seeming good cheer and holiday joy. Perhaps you love this “most wonderful” time of year, and this article won’t resonate with you. If that’s you, no worries, feel free to stop reading now.
But maybe you hate this time of the year. No, hate isn’t the right word. Maybe it just makes you feel down. It reminds you sharply of your own loneliness, the way no other time of the year can, because the very nature of the holidays implies being with family and friends. If you’re in the latter category, that’s okay. You’re not a bad person. Nothing is wrong with you. In fact, this year more than ever, due to the pandemic, many people are experiencing the holidays alone – perhaps for the first time ever – and may be feeling their loneliness poignantly. Therefore, If you are alone for the holidays, or feel lonely even though you are surrounded by people, below is a list of potential activities which may help you feel less isolated during the holidays, and reinvigorate your good spirits.
- Spend time providing self-care. This option may feel tired or cliche, but it’s constantly touted by others for good reason: it is a tried and true method to help improve mood, and it gives people an avenue to practice self-love. Enjoy some me-time and get acquainted, or reacquainted, with your own company. Do a face mask, practice meditation, paint your nails, take a bath, and simply luxuriate by yourself. Do whatever activity makes you happy!
- Have a dance party in your bedroom. Turn on some good jams and dance like nobody’s watching – because they aren’t! Get as crazy and wild as you want without fear of judgement or embarrassment. Go ahead and practice your booty shaking in the mirror, or perhaps learn the WAP dance from Tik Tok if you’re feeling up to a challenge.
- Once the sun goes down, go for a long drive and look at the Christmas light displays in your neighborhood. Try turning the Christmas music down low on the radio or feel free to just enjoy the silence of the night. There’s a peculiar beauty and nostalgia to this activity, night driving and gazing at Christmas lights. Seeing the lit up displays can boost your mood and even bring on feelings of wonder and joy. It’s hard to feel lonely when surrounded by such warm and inviting sights. People put in the effort to make their homes look beautiful with lights, trees, wreaths, and candles, so appreciate their efforts by sitting with yourself and just looking.
- Reconnect with an old friend via social media. Perhaps there’s a person from your past that you drifted apart from a while ago, and with whom you would like to talk to again. (But maybe not an ex romantic partner as that could become complicated.) Maybe you’re interested in learning how they’ve been, what they’re up to, or just plain-old miss their company. Who knows, they might just feel the same. For instance, I had a best friend in elementary school whom I lost contact with, and sometimes I miss the simple times we would spend together just gossiping and sitting on this giant rock in her woods.
- Become a pen-pal with a nursing home resident. Perhaps more than any of us, the elderly who are stuck in long term care facilities, without any visitors, feel the negative impact of being alone during the holiday season. This year may be especially lonely for this population, as many nursing homes are not allowing in-person visitors during the holidays for the safety of their residents. Therefore, becoming someone’s pen pal can brighten up his or her day and maybe make all the difference this holiday season. For many elderly individuals in nursing homes, they may just need a person to talk to, someone to whom they can vent frustrations or tell their jokes to. They may not have had anyone present in their lives for a long time who is genuinely interested in their lives and would be willing to listen to them, and actually hear what they have to say. This interaction may be helpful in alleviating loneliness for both you and the resident this holiday season. Furthermore, you might be surprised by the fascinating pasts many of these individuals have lived, the crazy adventures they want to reminisce about, and the stories or wisdom they have stored up over the years and wish to tell someone about. For more information: https://villageconcepts.com/become-a-pen-pal-to-help-seniors-combat-loneliness-heres-how-to-get-started/
Through all these potential activities the goal is not to fight or struggle against the loneliness, or the melancholy, afflicting you. Let yourself feel all the feelings. Permit them to wash over you and accept them, but don’t allow them to control you. Don’t let yourself sit in bed and wallow in your sadness. Instead feel what is being felt without dwelling, self-criticism, or worry; and take steps, however small, to achieve whatever joy and happiness that is available to find, and capitalize on those good moments.
Best wishes,
Megan
P.S. Here are some fun songs to get your bedroom dance party started.
Sia – Santa’s coming for us
Lady Gaga – Edge of glory
Walk the moon – Shut up and dance with me
Lizzo – Juice
Cardi B – WAP
Kenny Loggins – Footloose
Kesha and pitbull – Timber
Jason Aldean – Take a little ride
Jonas Brothers – Like it’s Christmas