The first impression is everything when you first meet someone. It is of such great importance, that the way you present yourself to another person will let them decide how they will view you the next few times you speak, or don’t. For an insight on how to break the ice with a stranger, I asked my fellow peer and social bee Nick to lay out the base of starting a communication with someone. To start off our own dialogue, I ask him to list some worthy topics that would be ideal to bring to the table for starters. He replies with, “It really depends on the person at hand and what type of vibe they are giving out, then I’d go from there. Whether it’s discussing the complexities of life and the world or simply starting off with some jokes to loosen up the mood, it’s comes down to taking the first step.”, states Nick. Very well said and some great pointers for those who shake with the nerves of getting the ball rolling.
Not only is the subject of discussion when getting to know an individual important, but the environment of where these interactions are taking place is essential as well in creating the mood and path for the first encounter. “Ideally I would go somewhere outdoors, like a park where we can talk one-on-one and have a more relaxed and interactive connection.” Unlike the common answers of going to the movies or going to grab a bite, the park is the type of location to really disconnect, unwind and project who you are due to the calm atmosphere and detachment from constant distractions like a city would have. One of the things that stands out the most when you are speaking to somebody is definitely body language. Although not everyone takes notice of that, Nick does not fail to let me know how important it is when reading the person with whom you are getting to know. “The way the person is sitting or positioned can let me know if they are interested in what is going on, if they’re into the conversation or if they’re even listening to me at all. If they don’t want to talk or be present, then it should be said rather than done not so discretely with their body language which is putting off.”.
Along with not engaging in a conversation, bad grammar, mumbling and table manners are a few deal breakers that are not welcomed warmly by Nick. “if a person has bad grammar, that is a major turn off, both speaking and messaging wise. It’s not attractive at all.” Simple as that people, speak with etiquette and do not dumb yourself down for someone or for the group setting you’re within. Individuality and originality come in to play for him as well when soaking up the first impression. Just be yourself and the rest will follow. Before we wrap up I had to ask what his method of approaching is like, he responds humbly with “most people think that because I am social that I don’t get nervous but honestly when I have to go up to someone I don’t know, I can be quite shy. But, like anyone breaking ground the first time, I start with a normal conversation about anything and go from there.”. Nick also states that you have to make friendships with those with whom you both have common ground and where both individuals understand each other, that is the foundation to first meeting someone. The first encounter may not be smooth but it is the sole way to pave interactions that you never knew could be made and may result in lifelong bonds.