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A Guide to Valentine’s Day

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Haverford chapter.

Valentine’s Day is approaching. In case you hadn’t noticed.

Although, admittedly, it’s a little hard when all the local supermarkets have become plastered with ribbons, balloons, and streamers in red, pink and white since after New Year’s Eve. The aisles have become flocked with bags of chocolates and other “valentine’s themed” candy, as well as numerous teddy bears and other romantic furry creatures.

Facebook posts are becoming flooded with cute Valentine’s Day date ideas, what your boyfriend/girlfriend really wants for Valentine’s Day, and frustrated singles complaining about their lack of a love life.

As a fellow single Pringle, allow me to share with you some of the great single-20 something year old life lessons that I’ve begun to embrace in these past few months that might help you with Valentine’s Day looming before us.

1. Date yourself.

One thing I’ve noticed is that sometimes people are so preoccupied with the idea of being in a relationship with someone that they begin to lose hold of who they really are and what they really want in life.

Take this time to figure out your personal likes, dislikes, goals, and dreams without having anyone there to influence you. Figure out who you are and what makes you, you. Join a club or some other activity that interests you, just because you can and that time isn’t taken up by a boyfriend/girlfriend. Discover what you’re truly passionate about and work it into your life. Find things that make you genuinely happy and pursue them.

2. Take advantage of being a single 20-something year old.

Let’s go through the stereotypical life timeline. At this stage, most people are in college, trying to figure out what to do with their lives. Then, most people will either go to graduate school or straight into a career. Most people (at least according to my Facebook newsfeed), get engaged/married anytime between their senior year of college and their mid to late twenties. From then on, basically just think of the beginning of the Pixar movie Up, except most likely with children and grandchildren.

The point is, that this period of our lives is a very precious window of time that we’re not likely to experience again. As a single 20-something year old, if you want to study abroad in Botswana, you don’t have to think about how this will affect your significant other and have a very long deep conversation about dating long-distance. You’re not worried about leaving your job and two kids. You have complete freedom and independence that you may never completely get back. This isn’t meant to terrify you, but to enlighten you. Carpe Diem, seize the day. Go on crazy adventures, travel the world, do a ton of random weird things that you can tell your grandkids about one day. 

3. Cherish the people you love.

Who is the person who calls you and tells you to vent because they could tell by your last text that something was off? Who is the person you call at 2am when you’re crying and just want to feel like someone’s there? Who knows when you’re being a stubborn idiot and isn’t afraid to let you know?

These are the people that are there for you through your best and worst, through every relationship, family/friend craziness, nervous breakdown, etc. no matter what. But, when you’re dating someone, no matter how much you try not to, it’s natural to spend less time with your friends and family. So, take advantage of being single to show them how much you love them. And since Valentine’s Day is just around the corner, focus your Valentine’s love and creativity into making those wonderful people feel like the incredible, cherished human beings that they are.

4. Take this time to better yourself.

When you’re in a relationship, it gets kind of easy to slack off. So, accept that you’re in control of your life and your own decisions and do something about it! Make a super awesome playlist and hit the gym, no excuses.

Actually be on top of all your classes and start reading ahead, stop procrastinating. Start creating an overall healthier diet (but don’t feel bad about splurging on your guilty pleasure every once in a while). Whatever it is that you’re feeling guilty about, now is the time to grow into the best version of yourself. You have time and motivation to work hard. So do it. 

Being single is not a curse and it does not mean that there’s anything wrong with you. Take advantage of the opportunities that you have while being single. Although Valentine’s Day can make people who are not in relationships feel self-conscious, there is absolutely no reason to feel bad for yourself. Take advantage of being young, free and independent and take control of your own destiny.