I’ve always been pretty good at maintaining my friendships but recently it’s gotten really difficult for me. My childhood best friend, for eleven years and counting, moved to Maryland and I underestimated how much distance can affect a relationship. I’ve never had a friend be that far from me and honestly, this has been a test. Towards the end of last year, it was beginning to feel like the end of such a beautiful run. All of our funny conversations, boy stories, vent sessions, etc. turned into a series of weak conversations. You know, those “What are you doing?” every few minutes type of conversations and that’s actually pretty draining because her and I never struggled with talking. She’s always been someone that I can talk to about any and everything and to see us reach a point where we don’t know what we’re doing anymore, that shit sucked. It’s like being associates all over again. How the hell do I feel like I’m back in square one after spending majority of my life with her?
After a while we went through a period where we didn’t speak at all; this went on for a few months. Finally, Sis texted me and called me out on my lack of effort. At first, I was offended because the phone works both ways. How can you call me out on something we’re both doing? Look at me, missing the whole point, right? This was her way of reaching out to me, the Aries way. You know they’re never wrong. Anyways, this phone call lasted about four and a half hours and by the end we decided that she’s still my forever girl and the love was still there; we just had to get better at keeping in touch. Communication is the key to success in all relationships. I underestimated this factor before, but I now realize that communication goes a long way, okay? It could be a conversation through text that lasts twenty minutes, a five-minute phone call, it doesn’t matter. People actually love and appreciate the effort you put forth. You simply thinking about them and caring enough to reach out really shows your friends/family that you’re still all in.
The solution to our problem was FaceTime. We agreed to FaceTime each other whenever one of us crosses each other’s mind. That way, the conversation isn’t forced, and we would have things to talk about considering the possibles gaps in each FaceTime call. Trying to talk to someone everyday can be a hassle because how many different conversations can you have three days in a row? Repetition kills fun. I don’t ever want to feel like that about any of my friends again. I’m telling you, it is one of the worst feelings ever. You’re literally watching someone you care about drift away from you; I wouldn’t wish that feeling on my worst enemy. My advice to anyone who may be going through this is think about all the good memories that you have with this friend. No matter how long you’ve known them, think about when you first met. Think about if you’re ready to let all of that go and move on in life without them? Cherish your friendships and do what you have to do to keep those relationships fresh and full of love.