The foundation of a mentor and mentee relationship is supposed to be clear and helpful. Hostile intentions and failed attempt and failed attempts at popularity recreate this relationship at Florida A&M (FAMU).
FAMU has a myriad of peer mentoring and leadership development programs. These points of contact are often student run clubs, organizations or a part of a university program. Mentors who donate their time and wisdom get an opportunity help another student transition into the university. However, mentors sometimes use this opportunity as a chance to live vicariously through mentees.
Allahandro Bradford, 21, serves as a lead peer mentor for the office of university retention said he feels that mentoring is good if the intentions are pure. Bradford’s role allows him to help a transition 25 students from high school to college. He understands firsthand the importance of proper mentorship.
“It is good to have someone experienced to show you the do’s and don’ts of the university,” Bradford said.
Freshmen often time fall prey to ill-intentioned mentors because they place their trust in the first upperclassman that they meet. The students do not understand the time, money and favoritism that contribute to the glamorized social success stories they’ve heard.
Students who enroll in summer sessions meet people seeking mentees sooner than others. Upperclassmen scout them early and befriend them with first year survival tips, rides to Wal-Mart and helping moving in. Most mentors critique physical features first in selecting a mentee. Being lighter, having long hair, or fitting the stereotype of what is considered to be ‘masculine’ play a major role in being selected for mentorship Public speaking ability, likeability and style factor in the decision making process.
Mentees are often later grouped with similar freshmen. These groups of mentees often help create early friendship networks. After the proper introductions to prominent campus officials and personal grooming, the race for social status begins. The top prizes in the competition crowns, titles and/or Greek letters.
Davonte Fason, a second year psychology student from Bartow, Fla., said he feels mentoring takes patience and experience.
“Mentors that I’ve had including teachers, friends, and family, have always given me the option to determine my own success,” said Fason.
The down side to the exploitative mentoring presence on campus is that everyone cannot win and every goal will not be accomplished. Students pride and feelings are often hurt when they come to realize that a system of unwritten rules that may have worked for some, does not work for all.
Once mentees realize that they received unfavorable advice, they tend to rebel. Mentor to mentee relationships become distant or non-existent as the mentee searches for his or her own path on campus. With new students and leaders rising each year, it is hopeful that mentor to mentee relationships will change and students will go back to the organic-style of mentoring.